Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

Ugh.

Once again, hubby's 4-day "visit" persuaded me to completely throw out all semblance of order and MODERATION. Well, actually, I think until last night, I would have done okay at maintaining, even though I didn't write anything down.

But last night was pure binging ugliness.

The night before weigh-in is always my biggest struggle and add to that the emotional eating that almost always happens the first night hubby's gone, and you've got a disaster of epic proportions.

So it stands to reason that I'm finishing off this challenge with a GAIN of 1.2 pounds. Blecgh.

I'm finding after the busy week I had ending Sunday night, that I'm just drained. I've got no energy, no focus, and I just don't care about anything! Which, of course, includes attempting to eat in moderation.

I think part of my problem is a spiritual problem. Again. After spending a few months in turmoil and struggling with conviction, now that I've found out why all that was happening and what the point was, I feel myself coasting again and not spending the same kind of time in the Word and in prayer as I did before. I'm not hungry for it anymore, which saddens me. Last week, I chalked it up to being insanely busy and having a bajillion things to do each day to keep the house running while I organized the church Christmas program, but this week it's just pure laziness.

So I think my goal for the next several weeks is not specifically quantitative, but rather qualitative ~ I want to feel my stomach rumbling before at least one meal each day (preferably two) and I want to dig back into my quiet time with God.

I want BOTH kinds of hunger back!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

Randomness again.

I just don't get it.

I just don't understand how, after the horrible eating and exercise week I've just had, and knowing TOM should be arriving this weekend....

I just don't get how I'm down a pound.

But I'll take it!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

Tuesday (half)

Lazy; didn't record. Safe to say it wasn't treated like a half day...

Wednesday (liquid)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Shovelled the walk: 10 min

(I'm not a fan of winter, but I actually quite like this built-in outdoor exercise that comes with it, especially on days when I can't leave the house to go for a walk. And when I'm desperate, we've got a 75-ft driveway I can shovel, too!!)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: 1 mug ginger peach tea w/tsp. honey, handful assorted snacking crackers

Supper: 1 serving Scalloped Potatoes & Ham, 1 large serving cucumber salad, 1 c. ice tea

Evening: 1 large bowl Honey-Nut Cheerios w/skim milk, 2 slices FRESH-FROM-THE-MACHINE bread w/margarine and 4 slices of cheddar, small bowl barbecue chips.

Ugh. And I started out SO WELL! Nuts.

Thursday (normal)

Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1/2. skim milk, 1 slice toast w/Nutella

2 miles: 35 min

(Walked. It was -15C/5F this morning, so I had to break out the ski pants and winter boots. Probably won't be jogging anymore till spring...)

Shovelled the walk: 10 min

Late morning: 2 large handfuls salted, mixed nuts; 2 mugs mint green tea (one w/honey)

Lunch: a bit too large a serving of leftover Scalloped Potatoes & Ham from last night, 1 large glass ice tea

Supper: 1 c. Main Course Soup, 1 cheese toast, 1 slice cheddar (as I was preparing the cheese toasts!)

Evening: 3 servings chips, 1 can Coke

Dang it, I've got laundry to fold! Why wasn't I doing THAT??!!

Friday (normal ~ switched with Saturday; and yes, this means I broke the rule about not having the same type of days back-to-back!!)

Breakfast: 1/3 c. oatmeal, cooked, w/a bit of skim milk and a heaping Tbsp. brown sugar, coffee w/skim milk

Lunch (and a friend over to plan church Christmas program): 1 c. Main Course Soup, 1 Cheese, Chive & Garlic biscuit, 1 c. V8 Splash

Supper: 1 can Coke, 1 hotdog w/chicken weiner and a slice of processed cheese, small helping of baked fries

Evening: 1 can Coke

Stayed away from the TV and avoided snacking this evening ~ woo-hoo!!

Saturday (fasting/liquids ~ traded w/Friday)

Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk

Lunch: 1 c. V8 Splash

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/tsp honey each

Before Supper: 2 handfuls mixed nuts, 3 slices cheddar

Supper: 1 serving Broccoli Cheddar Quiche, 3-1/2 Mom's Pantry Croissants w/margarine, 2 c. V8 Splash

Ugh. Again, I was doing SO well until I allowed myself one handful of nuts and a slice of cheese while making supper. See, but I could have compensated for the supper-making snack and given myself only an eighth of the quiche instead of a sixth. And I certainly could have stopped at just ONE croissant.... but I didn't.

I was so full, I wasn't even TEMPTED to snack later in the evening.

Sunday (half)

Breakfast: half slice of toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk, most in my coffee
Lunch: 1 hotdog, a few fries
Afternoon: 4 freshly-baked Sugar Cookies, 1 c. skim milk
Supper: 1/2 c. Chicken Noodle Soup, 1 Garlic Cheddar & Chive biscuit
Evening (had a friend come over after we'd both put our kids to bed ~ relax, her husband was at home!!): 1 serving Pear Crisp w/scoop of vanilla ice cream

Monday (liquids)
Breakfast: coffee, coffee, and more coffee w/skim milk (stayed up a little too late last night and can't even blame the friend.)
Late lunch: 1 c. V8 (Cold. Man, did I have to gulp it fast in order to choke it down!), sliver of Cheddar Broccoli Quiche
Supper: small serving Cheesy Chicken Rice Casserole, 2 servings raw veggies w/a bit of low-fat salad dressing for dipping
Evening: 1/3 bag butter-flavoured, lite microwave popcorn, large handful snacking crackers

NOT a good liquids day. Too bad it wasn't a "half" day ~ I think it would have been excellent!! All in all, a less than stellar week.

Again.

Total exercise time: 55 min (avg: 8 min/day) Yikes.
Average Exercise Level: Moderate
Total distance travelled: 3 mi/4.8 km

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

Maintenance week. ::sigh::

I have not kept track of my food intake since Friday morning and I have not followed the eating plan. There has been snacking, over-eating, eating full meals when I should have been eating half meals, and eating ANYHING when I should have been eating nothing. My husband was home from Friday night till last night, and on not ONE of those days did I go for a walk or a run.

And I can't even blame Thanksgiving ~ we got that over with way back in the first half of October.

I have NOT been "walking the talk."

Must give myself the obviously necessary kick in the backside, because I really do want to be under 155 by Christmas. That means only another pound, but it will get increasingly more difficult to achieve as we get closer and closer to the holidays. Not to mention all the celebrations, feasts, and family gatherings that will begin in only THREE weeks!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

Tuesday (half)
Breakfast: small piece of toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: small serving (probably only 2/3 c.) leftover Hamburger Stroganoff w/veggies & spaghetti, 1 c. ice tea, 1 small piece Fudge Nut Bars

2.75 miles: 45 min

(walked today)

Supper: half-serving leftover Jalapeno Corn Bake, 1/2 c. Salsa Rice, 1 c. cooked broccoli, 1 c. ice tea

Kindergarten Family Gym Night: 60 min

(OH. MY. GOODNESS. Playing kindergarten games LIKE a 5-yr old is a WAY harder workout than jogging!!!)

Evening: 1 pear, 1 mug unsweetened green tea

Pretty excited about how the day went today!!

Wednesday (liquids)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (half of it in my coffee)

Late Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/honey

Before Supper: 2 small Ritz cracker & cheese "sandwiches" ~ leftover from Peanut's lunchbag

Supper: 1 serving leftover Herbed Mashed Potatoes, chunk leftover BBQ Steak (from when the in-laws were out and provided steaks for hubby's birthday supper; probably about 5 ozs) w/prepared horseradish, 1 large helping Cheesy Zucchini (made w/lite cheddar)

Evening: 1 c. skim milk, two large pieces Fudge Nut Bars, 1 mug green tea w/honey

Thursday (normal)

Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey, 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: the last small piece of leftover steak and about 1 c. leftover mashed potatoes from last night's supper, 2 small pieces Fudge Nut Bars

hauled a wheelbarrow load of wood into the basement: 10 minutes

(6 trips into the basement with an armload of wood)

2.25 miles: 35 min

(walked again; quads and glutes still rather stiff from Tuesday night!)

Supper: 5 chicken nuggets, handful curly fries, 1 small piece Fudge Nuts Bars (man, I have got to get that stuff off the kitchen counter!!!), 1/3 bag of lite, butter-flavoured microwave popcorn

Friday (normal ~ switched with Saturday)

Breakfast: 2 toasted English muffins w/margarine, 1-1/2 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

Lunch: 2 Pizza Pops, 2 pieces Fudge Nut Bars

cleaned up remaining leaf piles and dismantled trampoline: 70 min

(light to moderate activity)

...and then things REALLY fell apart ~ eating-wise, exercise-wise AND reporting-wise! Hubby came home after being gone since Sunday afternoon and I'll admit, the remaining days this week did NOT follow the eating plan. Not even remotely. Even the man commented on that last night, much to my annoyance!

As of tonight or tomorrow, he'll be gone for 10 days, and that always makes it either easier or harder to stick with the plan. I don't seem to be able to maintain my plan while he's around and yet I never lose control in the evenings if he's home the way I sometimes do when I'm alone. Since I completely disregarded my plan with him home now the last three days, I'm hoping that means it'll be easier while he's gone!

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 40 min (avg: 31 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate
Total distance travelled: approx 13 mi/20.9 km

Weigh-In Wednesday ~ Tammi

I had a GREAT week!! This is the first week in a LONG time where I'm back at the point again where I actually kind of LIKE having a growling stomach. You know why?

Because it means I'm in control!! It means I'm not just impulsively stuffing my mouth, I'm not eating because I'm bored, lonely, depressed, or celebrating; I'm choosing to eat only when I'm actually hungry! (haha, now watch me TOTALLY mess up next week, now that I've said that!)

And I'm so pleased to be able to report that I'm right back where I was two weeks ago. That's right, after having to report a gain of 3.6# last week (eeek), I can report a LOSS OF 3.6 today!!!! Woo-hoo!!!

I'm sure I lost most of it last night. Man, I tell ya, if you want a workout ~ and I mean a workout like you've never had before if all you do is running, spinning, and the odd aerobics class as a rule ~ grab the nearest 5-yr old, follow them to school, and run around in the gym with them for an hour, playing their games the way THEY play them!!! Oh. My. Goodness. I almost DIED last night at my youngest's "family gym night" event!!

Two years ago, when my oldest was in kindergarten, I managed to LOOK like I was participating without actually doing much. This year, I determined I'd get right in there. (mostly because hubby wasn't along this time, and I couldn't rely on his enthusiasm for play to overshadow my laziness!) Due to the running I've been doing over the last few months, I could easily have handled playing the various games of tag for the full hour. No problems there. I wasn't even breathing as hard as many of the kids! (woo-hoo! SCORE for me!)

BUT....

Towards the end of the hour, we played this stop-start-crawllikecrazy-then-get-up-and-run-again relay race-type game that seriously almost made me pass out. I felt very green for a few minutes and had to sit down against the cold concrete wall. That was some incredibly intense interval training!

But what a great feeling to survive it!! When we got home, the girls had a piece of dessert before bed because they claimed they were both starving, and while I was very tempted to have one as well (and I'd TOTALLY earned it!), I waited until they were in bed and then I had a pear. That's it! Just a pear. And some unsweeted green tea.

I haven't felt that satisfied with the choices I've made in a very long time.

Walk the Talk Tuesday

Tuesday (normal ~ switched with Thursday)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk (some in the coffee), 1 slice toast w/Nutella
Lunch: 3 cornmeal muffins w/margarine & honey
Afternoon: 1 mini Banana Chip Muffin

raking: 60 min

Supper: 1- 1/2 c. Lemon Chicken & Rice Soup, 2 slices cheddar, 1 slice toast w/margarine
Evening: 2 regular-sized Banana Chip Muffins w/margarine

Wednesday (liquids)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 1.5 miles in three half-mile intervals)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8, 1 c. V8 Splash

Raking: 30 min

(had more to do, but my arms just couldn't take any more!)

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/skim milk & honey
Supper: 1 slice cheddar, 1 burrito (approx 1/3 c. mixed taco beef, cooked rice, guacamole and a slice of cheddar wrapped in a 10" tortilla ~ great way to clean up leftover odds and ends!!), 1 stalk celery dipped in Caesar dressing
Evening: unsweetened green mint tea, 1 stalk of celery w/peanut butter

Thursday (half ~ switched with Tuesday)

Breakfast: 1 small toast crust w/Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

Lunch: 1 c. Kraft Dinner, 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 orange

Pick Your Spot Pilates: 30 min

(did all three 10-minute workouts ~ belly, butt, and thighs)

Afternoon: 1 large mug of hot chocolate, 1 soda cracker, 2 ripple chips while I made supper... but only TWO!!!!

Supper: 1 very small serving Old-Fashioned Tuna Potato Chip Casserole, small helping ginger glazed carrots.

Evening: leftover hot chocolate (about 1/2 c.), 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 cereal bowl Ripple chips, 1 Banana Chocolate Chip Muffin w/margarine

Except for the evening, this was another solid day. And the evening wasn't bad, really, either. If I hadn't stayed up so stinkin' late, my stomach would never have started to growl. But at least I waited for that before I started snacking ~ that's a victory in and of itself!

Friday (fasting/liquids)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most of it in my coffee)

2.25 miles: 30 min

(jogged and walked the usual 4 intervals)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8, 1/2 c. V8 Splash

Late Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey, 1 mini-Banana Chip Muffin (basically one large bite)

Supper: 1 KFC Spicy Big Crunch Sandwich, small fries, 1/2 large Pepsi

Evening: 1/3 bag low-fat microwave popcorn, large cereal bowl of Ripple Chips

Saturday (normal)

Brunch: coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, 2 fried eggs, 1 serving homemade hashbrowns, 1 small chunk steak, 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey

Afternoon: 1 c. iced tea

LATE Supper (9:30pm!): 1 c. ice tea, 1 burrito (leftover venison steak, rice, refried beans, onions & cheddar in a 10" tortilla) dipped in salsa and fat-free sour cream, 1 peanut butter & Nutella tortilla roll-up, 2 c. skim milk, handful jellybeans

Sunday (half)

Breakfast: 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1/2 c. V8 Splash, coffee w/skim milk

Lunch: 1/2 c. Multi-Bean Soup, 1/2 slice toast w/margarine, 1 c. ice tea

Afternoon: 2 mugs coffee w/skim milk

Supper: 1 cereal bowl Kraft Dinner

Pick Your Spot Pilates: 30 min

(all 3 workouts again)

Monday (liquids)

Fat-Burning Pilates: 40 min

(Yikes. Much harder than jogging!)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: had a few licks of cake batter to make sure I made it right! (I've learned the hard way how important it is to ALWAYS taste before baking!!)

Supper: 1 serving Hamburger Stroganoff (made w/fat-free sour cream) and spaghetti w/peas and carrots mixed in

Evening: finger foods ~ 1 small piece of dessert, 3 pieces veggie pizza, handful grapes, a handful of little whole wheat crackers w/cheese and pickles, 1/2 c. punch, coffee w/cream

Total exercise time: 4 hrs, 10 mins (avg: 36 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to Heavy
Total distance travelled: 12 mi/19.3 km (converting Pilates workouts and raking into miles adds approximately another 7.5 miles/12.1 kms to the physical distance travelled the days actually I went for a walk or jog.)

Weigh-In Wednesday ~ Tammi

Ugh. I made some SERIOUS REVERSE progress this week. I'm

UP

THREE. POINT. SIX.

POUNDS!!!!!

I'm so unimpressed with myself. Every now and again, I have a month where the week before "TOM" arrives, I'm just completely out of control. There's literally this sense of desperation to cram every last morsel in the house down my gullet. This month was by far my worst experience with it.

So that, combined with having company from Friday afternoon to Monday afternoon, which makes drinking juice instead of eating make me look like a questionable hostess....

Not good. VERY BAD, in fact.

This week's goals: no evening snacking, more prayer and inspirational reading when the munchies attack, and following my own advice!!!!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

Wow, y'all just have NO IDEA how badly I'd like to just pretend this week didn't happen!!

Tuesday (half day)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk (some in the coffee), 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella

2.25 miles: 45 min

(walked)

Lunch: 1/2 c. Lemon Chicken & Rice Soup, 1/2 ham sandwich w/half a slice of processed cheese, mustard & margarine
Afternoon: two handfuls assorted jelly beans, candy corn, etc.
Supper: nacho chips and homemade guacamole
Evening: more nacho chips w/guacamole. And some halloween chocolates. And then some more. And then some toasted pumpkin seeds. And then another chocolate. And another...

Ugh. Today. I. was. HORRIBLE!!!!!! Fortunately, weigh-in was first thing in the morning before the madness began. But still. Even if tomorrow wasn't a liquids day, I'd be tempted to punish myself by enforcing a fast.

Wednesday (liquids day)
Morning: coffee w/skim milk

2.25 miles: 35 min
(jogged and walked half-mile intervals)

Afternoon: 1-1/2 c. unsweetened apple juice, large mug ginger peach tea w/honey, 1 mug Chai tea w/skim milk & honey
Supper: 1 c. Multi-bean soup, 2 cheddar drop biscuits w/margarine, 1 c. iced tea
Evening: Blew it again. Halloween chocolates, 1 can Coke, and crackers w/swiss and cheddar cheese. This always happens when hubby has to leave for the night. I am so unimpressed with myself.

Thursday (normal)

2.25 miles: 40 min
(walked)

Breakfast: 1 Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffin w/margarine, 1/2 c. skim milk (all in my coffee ~ I had lots of coffee this morning!)
Early Lunch: 1 mug hot chocolate milk, 2 leftover garlic cheese biscuits from last night's supper
Afternoon: 1 serving Spaghetti w/Tuna & Lemon, 1 garlic cheese biscuit, 1 c. apple juice
Supper: 1 serving Shepherd's Pie, 1 serving Taco Chip Salad (lettuce, tomatoes, shredded cheddar, crushed nacho chips, dressing: half and half lite Miracle Whip and Calorie-Wise Sundried Tomato & Oregano dressing)
Evening: Wow, I'm not even going to detail what I ate. Suffice it to say, it was a binge of epic proportions.

I'm expecting "that time of the month" this weekend and every now and again, I've discovered this makes me eat uncontrollably. I seriously feel like I MUST stuff myself. It doesn't happen every month, but I've definitely noticed a bit of a pattern.

Friday (fasting)
HA.
Breakfast: 1 small bowl Corn Flakes w/a skim milk and a bit of brown sugar, 1 c. apple juice, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 peanut butter & Nutella tortilla roll-up sandwich, 1 c. skim milk
Supper: 1 serving ham fried rice, 1 large serving Japanese coleslaw, 2 egg rolls w/plum sauce, 2 c. iced tea, 1 halloween chocolate

Saturday (normal)
Brunch: 1 Brunch Enchilada, 1 large cornmeal muffin, coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 serving EACH orange and apple slices
Snack: 1 cinnamon roll, 2 slices cheddar, 1/2 c. skim milk

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 3/4 in four intervals)

Supper: 1/2 large barbecued pork chop, 1 large serving Herbed Mashed Potatoes, 1 large serving cooked carrots w/honey & ginger, 2 c. iced tea, 1 serving Gingerbread Cake w/Caramel Cream frosting, 1 c. skim milk

Sunday (half)
Breakfast: 1 bowl Corn Flakes w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 small slice bread w/margarine, 3 slices cheddar, 6 soda crackers, 1 c. Lemon Chicken Soup, handful mini chocolate bars

2.25 miles: 40 min
(walked)

Supper: 1 large serving Cordon Bleu Casserole Supreme, 1 serving steamed broccoli, 1 c. iced tea

Evening: chocolate covered almonds, 1 can pop

Monday (liquids)
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash
Lunch: 1 Brunch Enchilada, pickles, 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 slice toast w/margarine & jam, 1 c. iced tea
Afternoon: 1 mug tea w/honey

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 3/4 in four intervals)

Supper: 1 c. hot V8 w/swiss cheese, soda crackers, and a slice of rye bread w/margarine, 1/2 c. V8 Splash
Evening: Well, let's just say, "par for the course."

Wow. I think the scale is going to run and hide when it sees me come into the bathroom tomorrow morning... This was NOT a good week.

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 40 min (avg: 31 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to difficult
Total distance travelled: 13.5 mi/21.7 km

When you don't feel like it...

Take heart.

I've a confession to make. My last two evenings have been dismal failures in the self-discipline department. I have binged like you wouldn't believe. I can hardly believe it. While incredibly annoying and frustrating, I find it interesting that these kinds of evenings only seem to happen when I'm actually following a plan of sorts.

For the months in between this current return to the eating plan on the sidebar and the previous one (which ended in the beginning of July), I've rarely had what I'd call an evening binge. Regular evening snacking, yes; but not bingeing. And now, in the last week and a half since returning to the program, I've had at least three.

Isn't that the way it always seems to work? As soon as you make the resolution, the follow-through becomes more of a challenge than it was before?

For believers in Christ, I think this makes perfect sense. When we're coasting along, not being deliberate about our lives, the devil isn't concerned about the effect we'll have on the world around us. It's once we start burning a little brighter that he starts gettin' nervous, throwing up the distractions and the roadblocks.

I found some great wisdom and encouragement on the Desiring God blog this morning and I want to share it with you, too.

Did you wake up not feeling like reading your Bible and praying? How many times today have you had to battle not feeling like doing things you know would be good for you?

While it’s true that this is our indwelling sin that we must repent of and fight against, there’s more going on.

Think about this strange pattern that occurs over and over in just about every area of life:

• Good food requires discipline to prepare and eat while junk food tends to be the most tasty, addictive, and convenient.
• Keeping the body healthy and strong requires frequent deliberate discomfort while it only takes constant comfort to go to pot.
• You have to make yourself pick up that nourishing theological book while watching a movie can feel so inviting.
• You frequently have to force yourself to get to devotions and prayer while sleeping, reading the sports, and checking Facebook seems effortless.
• To play beautiful music requires thousands of hours of tedious practice.
• To excel in sports requires monotonous drills ad nauseum.
• It takes years and years of schooling just to make certain opportunities possible.

This goes on and on.

The pattern is this: the greater joys are obtained through struggle and pain, while brief, unsatisfying, and often destructive joys are right at our fingertips. Why is this?

Because, in great mercy, God is showing us everywhere, in things that are just shadows of heavenly things, that there is a great reward for those who struggle through (Hebrews 10:32-35). He is reminding us repeatedly each day to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7). Each struggle is an invitation by God to follow in the footsteps of his Son, “who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2).

Those who are spiritually blind only see futility in these things. But for those who have eyes to see, God has woven hope (faith in future grace) right into the futility of creation (Romans 8:20-21). Each struggle is a pointer saying, “Look! Look to the real Joy set before you!”

So when you don’t feel like doing what you know is best for you, take heart and don’t give in. Your Father is pointing you to the reward he has planned for all who endure to the end (Matthew 24:13).

For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are
unseen are eternal. (1 Corinthians 4:17-18)

Now, if that doesn't help you view your temptations and struggles in a new light, I don't know what will!!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ Tammi

And the downward slide continues! Met my goal again for this week ~ down another 1.2 lbs!!

This means, my friends, that since the very first year I was married (the year I packed on an incredible 40 lbs in just 6 months), this is the lightest I've ever been!!!

Oh, I've been lighter in my adult life, but since getting married and packing on all that weight, and TRYING to lose it year after year after year.... I'm finally getting somewhere!! I'm now exactly 2.2 lbs lighter than I've ever gotten on any previous attempt!! (yesterday, on my liquids day and after my run, it was closer to 4 pounds, but supper changed things a little.)

I'm loving the partnership I have with my bloggy friends Susanne and Jamie and the wonderful encouragement and support these ladies are. Knowing they're whispering prayers for me throughout the day certainly helps in the will-power department!

The return of Tammi's "Walk the Talk Tuesdays"

Tuesday (half day)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk
Mid-morning: 1/2 slice toast w/margarine

2.25 miles: 30 min

(walked 0.125, jogged 0.5, walked 0.25, jogged 0.5, walked 0.25, jogged 0.5, walked 0.125)

Lunch: 1/2 c. Creamy Wild Rice Soup
Afternoon: 1 large mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey
Supper: 1 small helping Beefy Jalapeno Corn Bake, 1/3 c. Salsa Rice, 1 large helping Cucumber Salad, 1 c. pink lemonade, 1 slice Chocolate Cream Pie (1/8 of a 9" deep dish pie ~ I made way too much on the weekend and now we've got this problem of having to eat it because it doesn't freeze well!) 1 c. skim milk
Evening: 1 individual Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and 1 mini Oh Henry bar

Okay, the "half" day kinda fell apart when we'd finished supper. We really do need to finish the pies (I've got a whole pumpkin pie in the fridge yet, too!) because ain't NO WAY I'm lettin' that Chocolate Cream go bad!!!!!! My stomach was growling later in the evening, so that's how I justified the two small halloween chocolates. I know, I know, I didn't follow the rules. I guarantee you I ate less than I have been, but definitely still more than half. It'll take me a while to get my head back into this, I think.

Wednesday (liquids day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, some of it in the coffee
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8 (w/a few seasonings and spices; eaten like tomato soup), 1 c. V8 splash
Afternoon: 1 large mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey
Supper: 1 serving Sunday Brunch Casserole, 1 slice Chocolate Cream Pie w/whipping cream, 1 c. skim milk (everyone else had just chocolate pie or pumpkin pie, but because I hadn't eaten all day, I wanted something other than just pie. I know, it's a weird meal, but, well, you can read about it here.)

Evening: 1/3 bag low-fat, butter-flavoured microwave popcorn (stomach started grumbling around 8-ish ~ it's amazing how quickly one feels full after not eating all day, but how quickly the hunger returns!)

Thursday ("normal" day)
Breakfast: 1 small-ish slice toast (it was the crust, so it was a bit smaller than a full-size slice) w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk, coffee

2.25 miles: 30 min
(four reps of jogging 3/8-mile, walking 1/8-mile with 1/8-mile warm-up/cool-down walk at each end)

Mid-morning: 1 banana
Lunch: 1 large serving Thanksgiving in a Pan (made with double gravy and a layer of mashed potatoes), 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 small piece Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake w/whipping cream
Afternoon tea: large mug tea w/1 tsp. honey, probably 2 servings of fresh fruit ~ cantaloupe, oranges, and apples.
Supper: small helping One Pot Ham Dinner, 1 large helping tossed salad w/Thousand Island dressing, 1 piece chocolate cream pie w/whipping cream, 1 c. skim milk
Evening: too many nacho chips w/salsa, 8 mini chocolate bars. UGH.

Friday (liquids day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, some of that in my coffee
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

3.25 miles: 60 min
(walked today)

Afternoon: 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: small serving barbecued chicken, 2 helpings scalloped potatoes, 2 servings cooked corn, raw carrot sticks and tomato slices, TWO slices of bread w/margarine, small helping apple crisp w/vanilla ice cream, coffee w/2% milk

We were invited over to the pastor's home for supper and I was FAMISHED!!!! Despite the large supper I ate, my stomach started howling again around 9:30, shortly after we got home, and I ended up having two handfuls of soda crackers and a glass of skim milk yet before going to bed! Amazingly, my Saturday morning weight was unchanged from my weigh-in weight.

Saturday (normal day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee), 2 pancakes w/margarine and syrup

4.25 miles: 60 min
(jogging and walking in half-mile repetitions, with a 1/8-mi warm-up/cool-down walk at each end)

Aternoon: 1-1/2 servings Sunday Brunch Casserole, 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: A&W onion rings, Teen Burger, 3/4 large root beer, 5 halloween chocolates, 1 c. skim milk

Ugh. WAY too many of the wrong kinds of rewards today!!

Sunday (half day)
Breakfast: 1/2 piece toast w/margarine & saskatoon jam, LOTS of coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 bowl hot V8, 1 cheese toast, 2 small slices cheese (while I was making lunch), 3 soda crackers, 1/2 c. skim milk, 1 Oreo cookie

3.25 miles: 55 min
(walking)

Supper: 1/2 bun w/margarine, 2 slices cheddar, a bunch of pickles, 1 small bowl of cherry preserves, several chunks of canteloupe
Evening: 1 mug peppermint green tea w/honey

Well, I don't like half days any more than the first time I went through this, but despite my dismal failure at lunch, the other two meals were definitely HALFERS!! I had to go to bed early to keep from eating in the evening.

Monday (liquids day)
Breakfast: coffee and 1 c. skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash

2.25 miles: 40 min
(jogged a combined total of 1.25 miles in 4 intervals, walked the rest)

Late Lunch: 1-1/2 c. hot V8, 1 c. V8 Splash
Afternoon Tea: 1 mug unsweetened green tea, 3 bite-sized pieces of celery w/peanut butter (fixing the girls an afternoon snack killed me! I didn't have much trouble with stomach rumblies today until our regular snack time after school.)

Supper: 1 large serving Lemon Tuna Spaghetti, 2 servings cucumber slices w/a bit of Creamy Caesar dressing
Evening: 1 stalk celery w/peanut butter, 1 orange, 1 c. skim milk ~ all while hubby sat beside me on the couch eating halloween chocolates!!!!!!!!!!!


Total exercise time: 4 hrs, 35 min (avg: 39 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to heavy
Total distance travelled: 17.5 miles/28.16 km


All in all, an okay week. Felt especially good to get back into jogging. We'll see how long the road conditions allow it!

Here We Go!!!

I'm back!! ;-)

It's been a while since I've posted... too long, actually. I am reporting in today at my HIGHEST weight EVER. Yet, I am not depressed, nor discouraged. I am on a journey... a pilgrimage... and the only way to get there is ONE STEP at a time.

Today I am focusing on the lies that I have believed about myself:

• You're not good enough.
• You can't do it.
• You don't deserve it.
• You'll never make it.
• Your doomed to be this way.
• You're such a disappointment.
• You'll always be that girl with "such a pretty face"... but the rest of you will never amount to anything.

Lies! Lies! Lies!!!

He (the devil) was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies. - John 8:44

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. - John 10:10

It's time to look up from my mess... quit focusing on the negative... STOP BELIEVING the lies and cast my eyes upon the hills:

I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;

indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

(Psalm 121:1-4)

You know... in a way he's right. The devil, I mean... maybe that's why his lies are so believable.

I can't do this. Not on my own. Not in my own strength. But "with God, all things are possible"... and "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength".

It's a NEW day!!!

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

(Lamentations 3:22-23)

Thank you JESUS!!! You are my STRENGTH, my SHIELD, my PORTION, my ROCK, my REDEEMER, my DELIVERER, and my FORTRESS... I will not be moved!!

So today, I will believe:

• I CAN do this.
• I WILL do this.
• I AM worthy of success.
• God IS who he says he is.
• God CAN DO what he says he will do.
• I AM who God says I am.
• I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who strengthens me.

No longer will I believe the lies of Satan. No longer will his traps ensnare me. My Redeemer comes in power to rescue me... and I am BELIEVING GOD for victory!!

Weigh-in Wednesday

And a big ol' WOO-HOO, because I met my target for this week!

I'd hoped to be at 157.0 this morning, and I was! Which means I'm down 1.8# from last week.

AND we had company from Friday night to Sunday night, I did NOT really do as well in the eating department as I would have liked, and I think I've only walked ONCE in the last 3 weeks.... It just really doesn't make sense to me.

Is it just me, or does this weight-loss thing appear very RANDOM much of the time? I'm not complaining, of course (not THIS time, anyway!!), but it does often seem to have little rhyme or reason, doesn't it?

Anyhoo... I've decided to re-adopt the eating plan on the sidebar and go through the 8-week Becoming a Woman of Moderation Bible study again with a bloggy friend. It will be a challenge, no doubt ~ and especially since we can't physically meet with each other ~ but with all that the Internet and modern computers have to offer, I'm sure we'll have no problems keeping in touch and keeping each other accountable. Well, no problems keeping in touch, for sure. The accountability thing will undoubtedly be a bit tougher!!

But I look forward to good results. AND to starting off the New Year (which begins exactly 8 weeks from Friday ~ that's right, you heard me!) on a positive note, instead of regretting over-eating and having to make the same ol' resolutions I always have in the past!!

Shrink-a-versary

Well, I'm not sure which "shrink-a-versary" I'm personally celebrating (seems I've been trying to shrink FOREVER!), but The Sisterhood is celebrating one year in existence next month and hosting not only another weight loss challenge, but daily giveaways for the entire month of November as well!

And it's time I hopped back on top of things. Since early summer, my weight has continued to drop, but not at all significantly. And while I'm impressed that I've been able to maintain a weight that hovers around and just under 160 lbs (as opposed to around or above 190!) without feeling like I'm missing out on anything, it's time to prove that I can accomplish a little bit more yet.

This challenge ends seven weeks from now, on December 16, and I'd like to drop 8.8 lbs during that time, which would bring me to an even 150. And being able to maintain THAT weight over Christmas holidays will really be an impressive personal accomplishment!!

I don't know that I really have a strategy in place just yet, but I'd planned to resume the habit of routine fasting this fall and that hasn't happened yet, so I think that will be step 1.

Running and walking is another thing that's sort of fallen by the wayside this fall since hubby's finally working full-time again, which means he's gone a minimum of 13 hours a day (and sometimes he doesn't even bother coming home, but sleeps in the truck overnight so that he can get more sleep hours) and the only days I can walk or run outside are kindergarten days and weekends. And even those have been pretty hit and miss, since he's been busy working at the shop on the trucks on weekends and the weather's been really damp the last several weeks. Of course, I have an elliptical and a couple workout videos, but so far, I haven't convinced myself to switch to those forms of exercise. That might be my step 2!

And cutting out evening snacking (AGAIN!) will be step 3. The never-ending battle!

All in all, I think 8.8 lbs in 7 weeks should be very doable. IF I start exercising some will-power.

I don't know what to call this post.

It really isn't something I want to talk about very badly. But I think it's the truth and I think we, as Christians, have become too eager to pretend that it isn't. I accept that my beliefs may be wildly unpopular. And please understand I'm saying this as much to myself as anyone else. I'm very guilty of subscription to this attitude and its resulting behaviors.

So what am I talking about?

Well, I guess it's this whole mentality that we need to "embrace" or "own" our limitations and concentrate on inner beauty ~ that it doesn't matter how overweight we are, because inner beauty is more important.

Now, before you get all huffy, I do believe that inner beauty is more important than outward appearance. My problem isn't with that statement itself, but what bothers me about it is the way we use it as an excuse not to try to do what's right and responsible. It gets used as an excuse for not developing the self-discipline we so sorely need in our affluent society. We justify gluttony using phrases like this.

Contrary to what seems to be popular belief these days, even among Christians, gluttony is not a right! And yet it is being recognized as such even in courts of law. You can literally eat your way into a protected group with all the same legal rights as the blind or deaf.

In his book, The One Year Devotions for People of Purpose, in the devotional called "Is Gluttony a Right?" Chuck Colson states:

"Laws are supposed to remind us what we ought to do. But the pro-gluttony ruling sanctions giving in to what we want to do ~ even if it's unhealthy. Folks who binge on candy and chips can now do so with the confidence that even the courts will defend their right to self-indulge.

Christians ought to view the temptation to overeat as a challenge to build character, not fat reserves. Living in an affluent culture as we do, many of our temptations come not because we have too little but because we have so much. Unlike people in poor cultures, [North] Americans can afford to buy all the food we want ~ including the high-calorie junk food that puts on the pounds.

Proverbs 30 reminds us that both poverty and riches can be a trap. Poverty may tempt us to steal, but riches tempt us to gluttony.

Philippians 3 condemns gluttony as a form of idolatry. People whose 'god is their stomach' are headed for eternal destruction.

The last thing we need is false compassion that turns human weakness into a civil right."

It's good there are people standing up and saying we shouldn't be judging people based on whether they're skinny or fat, that it's their character and personality that matter. Better yet, ones that actually LIVE by that principle and demonstrate that they actually believe what they say. But it's BAD that we are allowing these arguments to lull us into the belief that gluttony is no longer a sin.

We CAN be beautiful regardless of our size. True beauty IS on the inside and that matters MOST to God. We should definitely have this attitude with regards to others, but when examining ourselves, we need to be careful we don't embrace this idea too tightly and allow it to become license for indulgence. If our lives are evidence of what we believe, of what doctrine we subscribe to, a woman of faith should demonstrate her desire for godliness with a heart attitude of modesty and self-control.

We do need a healthy self-image, but we also need to remember to look at ourselves in the context of "what do my physical appearance and my eating habits say about my relationship with Christ? Is it obvious that I'm allowing the power of God to transform me and to help me fight temptation, or obvious I'm not?"

We need a healthy self-esteem. But we need to be careful self-esteem doesn't become self-love, which very often gets used as an excuse to NOT change. God's grace does cover our failures; He does love us unconditionally, but that doesn't necessarily mean He thinks we're perfect just the way we are. God's grace is not a license to sin; it's the power He gives us to fight temptation.

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

(1 Cor. 6:19-20)

Weigh-in Wednesday

I'm basically the same as last week. Up 0.6.

But considering there were two Thanksgiving potlucks and one big turkey dinner with friends, I'm considering that maintenance.

I'm glad this challenge officially ends on Saturday though, rather than today...
...that gives me a couple more days to try and lose the Thanksgiving ounces ~ and hopefully even a couple extra!!

Every year on the last Sunday in October, our church gets together with the other small churches from our particular affiliation that are within a couple hours' drive of each other, and this year, they're having a food collection offering, so that will be the perfect place to bring what I'm hoping will amount to at least 4 lbs of groceries!! Maybe, I'll include next week's weigh-in to boost my "donate-able" weight!

I have not done as well with this challenge as I was hoping to, but I guess I've pretty much just exposed the problem, too. I was HOPING it instead of DOING IT. When will I ever learn?!

Weigh-in Wednesday

Ugh. I've been such slacker the last two weeks. Not blogging much, forgetting to weigh myself, eating whenever and whatever I felt like...

Needless to say, I was a little surprised this morning when I stepped on the scale.

In a good way.

I'm down 2.2 from two weeks ago!! Which brings me to only 3.6# for this challenge, but an even 24 since I started trying to lose weight right after Easter.

Which means that....

...since 1997 ~
the year I got married,
and the year my roller-coaster weight began its initial, mountainous climb ~

I'm the lightest I've ever been!!

Woo-hoo!!!!!