Becoming a Woman of Moderation

Weigh-In Wednesday: Burst into Summer FINALE!

2011-08-31T06:09:00.000-05:00

Man, I can't believe this challenge is over. When we first started, it sounded like so much time! But here we are: the end of a challenge, the end of August, the end of summer...

And 5 lbs lighter!

Not exactly what I was hoping for, but then I wasn't planning on being quite as busy and routine-free as we ended up being either! So I'm happy.

In a season where I generally tend to GAIN a few, a 5-lb loss is victory.

Tomorrow is September and I imagine the Sisterhood will kick off a new challenge in a week or two. I'm not sure where I'm going from here though. I mean, I still plan on losing more weight, but I'm not sure about this blog. I'm debating either leaving it for a while, or just posting periodically ~ when I feel like it ~ or deleting it altogether. I tend to get annoyed with feeling "obligated" to post regularly, and then I get stubborn and self-sabotage.

So I don't know. My weight-loss efforts will continue, but this blog has felt a little pointless for quite some time already.

"Sitting is Killing You"

2011-08-18T06:00:00.006-05:00

Saw this link on someone's FB page and found it interesting. (click on the infographic itself to head over to the larger, easier-to-read original)

Via: Medical Billing And Coding

Kinda makes ya wanna get up and hoe a couple rows in the field before dark, doesn't it?

Weigh-In Wednesday

2011-08-17T06:36:00.043-05:00

Still sloggin' through summer!

Again, no major comings or goings to report, but a small loss is a big deal in summer when there's no schedule, no routine, the days are lazy and the weekends filled with friends and family gatherings...

I'm down a measely 0.4, which brings me back (FINALLY) to my lowest point this challenge, which I reached several weeks ago. This current Sisterhood challenge is only two weeks away from ending, and though my ultimate goal will be a struggle indeed, it is technically still do-able.

I will just have to decide I really want it. And with my birthday, a weekend family gathering, and potentially a few days hosting my in-laws all in between now and the 31st, I will need all the determination I can muster!

One thing I've done consistently well this summer, even at gatherings and visiting at both parents' homes, is resisting the urge to snack in the evenings. It happens on occasion, but hasn't been a regular occurrence like it once was, so I'm pretty happy about that. That's probably the biggest battle in my weight-loss war.

Now if I could just learn to love replacing some of the things I eat both at mealtimes and when I allow snacking with fruits and vegetables, I'd be home free!!

Weigh-In Wednesday

2011-08-10T08:44:00.001-05:00

I HATE it that I have to report a slight gain this week! Team 20 is kickin' some SERIOUS HEINY in this competition and I really hate the thought of being the one to unseat us from our top spot!!

But I did gain a bit.

And if it wasn't for this competition, I'd be very happy about the 0.4 lbs I packed on over the last two weeks, because for one of those weeks, we were on holidays.

There was one day of rodeo food, two full days of family gathering food and sitting around at the lake, two days of my mom's cooking and over-feeding, a date night including FAR too many deep-fried delicacies (ie. fish 'n' chips and MARS BARS) followed by ballpark snacks (quite likely also deep-fried!), and two days of my mother-in-law's cooking and overfeeding.

So you see, a gain of only 0.4 under those circumstances really is a victory in most cases.

Except when you're part of a weight-loss TEAM, dang it!

Weigh-In Wednesday

2011-07-20T06:00:00.000-05:00

No change this week. Which I'm okay with. We spent the weekend camping with The Man's family, which, as you can probably imagine, involved a lot of sitting around and eating.

Personally, I don't believe lunch is necessary when you only finish breakfast at 11 am, but obviously not everyone is of the same opinion!! The powers that be cook provided three square meals a day, so that's the way it was. I tried to make sure I limited my portions ~ especially at lunch! ~ but it was still more food than I really needed, given the general lack of activity.

And then the night before last (which is the night before weigh-in for me), a girlfriend and I went out for supper in the town near the camp where we'd just dropped our kids off for the week, so that didn't help either.

But I'm happy. It's been a fun week with lots of great food and I haven't gained, so I feel pretty lucky, actually!!

Weigh-In Wednesday

2011-07-13T06:00:00.071-05:00

Okay, so...

I have a bit of a confession to make.

I didn't actually step on the scale last week.

I forgot.

So I just kinda fudged the number.

I figured if I reported a loss of 0.6, I could easily lose it the following week if need be. You know, a realistic number where I wouldn't get caught in my lie.

But I kinda got caught anyway.

Because this week, I am suddenly down 3.4 pounds!

And y'all KNOW there's no stinkin' way I actually lost that much in just one week!
But I can chalk up that success ~ over the last TWO weeks ~ to virtually no snacking of any kind (it happened just one evening over the last week and a half, and it was two large pancakes smothered in butter and swimming in syrup.... mmmmmmmmm, delicious!) and really watching my portions at mealtimes.

And the nicest thing is, I haven't really been thinking about it much. It's really only crossed my mind a couple of times when I wanted to eat late at night and I forced myself to be content with a cup of green tea. I have not gotten my daughters involved in meal- and snack-planning yet like I said I wanted to, but one thing I've noticed myself doing is making sure I eat only what I give them or tell them to eat. And sometimes I just don't, even when they are.

(Since June 1)

So maybe I'm finally getting somewhere!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2011-07-06T08:23:00.000-05:00

Woo-hoo! I'm down 0.6! It's not a lot, but at least it's the right direction.

I am still not into the swing of summer holidays ~ the girls finished school a week ago yesterday and we were gone for the long weekend, so there's not much of a routine yet. And I'm also finding I don't have much time for blogging!

Hope all y'all had a great week!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2011-06-22T06:00:00.016-05:00

Ugh. NOT a great start to a challenge!!

Fortunately, I don't have to report a gain, but once again, I also can't report a loss. Zip. Zero. Zilch.

NOTHIN'.

I know exactly what the problem is, too. Snacking. I can exhibit all sorts of self-control at mealtimes, but I cannot seem to control the snacking. If I don't sit down in front of the TV at ALL, it's okay, but if I spend ANY time there... I ~~nibble~~ binge.

I allow one little snack, thinking that will be it ~ because, after all, I'm trying to lose weight and break bad eating habits and all ~ but it's like a dam bursts as soon as that first bite hits my tongue. And then I can't stop.

Hi, my name is Tammi, and I'm a compulsive over-eater.

In a way, I'm actually kind of looking forward to having the girls home all day so that I won't have quite so many opportunities to lose control.

Here we go again...

2011-06-15T06:00:00.101-05:00

Kickin' off another weight-loss challenge over at The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans!! And this one's another TEAM challenge.

I'll confess, that makes me a little nervous. I mean, who wants to be the one responsible for sabotaging their team's efforts, right?? It's a bit scary, given my track record, but I'm determined to be a POSITIVELY CONTRIBUTING member!!

I'm down an even pound from last week, so I'm still making progress, but again this week I've been too weak in my struggle with "the munchies." I have had a couple of good self-discipline days, but I know I definitely had more that weren't. I need to change that ratio up a little, especially since I'm very rapidly approaching the weeks where I will NOT be fasting intermittently!

I talked about an eating plan a couple weeks ago that I've followed in the past with great success that incorporates intermittent fasting, but that I wasn't sure how I felt about not eating while my girls are around to witness my eating habits during the day. I've decided that it's not really something I want them to see, since it's not something I want them employing should they suddenly feel they need to control, or ~ perish the thought ~ LOSE weight. Because they really don't! They're both very active little girls and neither sports a single excessive ounce, believe me!!

But they know their mom struggles with self-discipline in the eating and exercise areas and that's why she has more weight than necessary. They understand working to lose the weight takes serious effort, and while there are plenty of health benefits to fasting regularly, it really doesn't set the example that I want them to follow. I want to help them learn to make wise decisions in this, and all areas of life, so that they won't have to work at undoing as many mistakes!

So my plan this summer is to let THEM do the meal- and snack-planning. Well, assist me with it, anyway! They know mom should probably have a few carrot and celery sticks rather than a handful of chips ~ after all, that's what I make them choose!! (Man, I am such a hypocrite.) They're also quite interested in seeing how our meals fit into the Canada Food Guide, so I think this plan for summer eating will be good for all of us. It might even find us making some long-term dietary changes...

Here's hoping!!

Wednesday Weigh-In

2011-06-08T06:00:00.004-05:00

Nothin' to report today.

No weight loss ~ no weight gain.

Considering we had weekend company (again) and that it's that special time of the month (again), I'm pretty happy with NOTHING.

But here's to some steady forward progress now that "houseguest season" is over and a new challenge is beginning! :)

May MY Weigh-in and Challenge Wrap-Up

2011-06-01T06:13:00.055-05:00

Well, I'm back down to where I was the second week. But at least it's down from the beginning of the month and not up! I'm posting a grand total loss of only 2.2 pounds for the last 4-1/2 weeks.

I gotta say, I'm not real pleased with that. Especially since if weigh-in day had been on Monday, I would have been able to say a total loss of 3.8!!

I've decided to return to what worked the best for me in the past ~ a return to the eating plan recommended by the Bible study that kicked off this whole blog. There's no counting, no calculating, no planning ~ just no breakfast and lunch some days! As tough as it might be for some to understand, I find it easier to just not eat than to care about what I can or can't have, how much, how many points it's worth, or how many fat and calories it contains. I even find it easier than days when the eating plan allows half-portions all day. I guess I'm a bit of an "all or nothin'" kinda gal in that way!

I quit using this eating plan two years ago once summer rolled around. When my girls were home during the day, I didn't want them to see me "starving myself" on the liquids/fasting days. This year, with deciding to start again only a month before school's out, I'm faced again with the dilemma of how to handle it or if I will continue at all. (My past experience with quitting and then trying to resume 2 months later would tell me it makes more sense NOT to take a break!!)

My girls know I'm overweight, and they know it's because I eat more than my body needs for daily function. They understand the relationship there, and they also understand that because I wasn't more self-disciplined all these years, there's hard work to be done in order to reverse the effects ~ the weight AND the attitude/habits. So I'm not sure I really NEED to hide it, yet I'm not sure I can do it successfully in a way that doesn't seem like I'm just consumed with meeting the beauty standards of the media. So the jury's still out on that one.

But it is a return to the plan that netted me my loss this week, so I'm looking forward to at least another four weeks of good progress before summer begins!

May My Weigh-in Wednesday

2011-05-25T06:06:00.000-05:00

Well, I gotta say, I don't hold a WHOLE lot of hope for reaching my goal anymore...

That nasty 2.2 gain last week kindasorta wrecked the whole thing!!

Funny how even just a little bit of reverse progress puts the goal so much further away, isn't it? It's more of a set-back than you realize because you gotta lose the gain first before you can continue! Sucky.

I did lose a little this past week, even though my parents were out this weekend and took us on a road trip. Two days of nibbling in the van while travelling, and eating out normally has a very negative affect on my weight! But amazingly, I'm down 0.6 from last week, which means I'm at least a TINY bit lighter again than my starting weight this month!

And I have NO plans for company or travel for the next week, so I'm planning for a big finish!! :)

(Wish me luck!)

May MY Weigh-In Wednesday

2011-05-18T06:00:00.047-05:00

Ugh, I totally TANKED this week.

Wednesday and Thursday were okay, and Friday during the day, too, but then our weekend company arrived for suppertime and that was the end of all restraint and, dare I say it... moderation. {groan}

My brother-in-law and his family came, as well as another single sister-in-law, and we had a WONDERFUL time together. I used paper plates and plastic cups all weekend, so I spent minimal time in my kitchen time, and I'd asked the two ladies to bring the snacks for the weekend and they REALLY came through!!

We spent our weekend eating,

sitting around outside, enjoying the first summer-like weather we've had this year,

snacking,

eating again,

followed by more sitting around,

a little sunburnin',

and then more snacking.

You get the idea.

I had an awesome weekend... but I'm up 2.2 lbs.

Which means I'm heavier than when we started this challenge at the beginning of the month.

::sigh::

I've got my work cut out for me.

May MY Weigh Wednesday

2011-05-11T06:00:00.109-05:00

Does anyone else just compulsively throw EVERY. SINGLE. THING. they can find into their mouths at the beginning of that time of the month?? I never used to have any of the "symptoms" that so many women complain about, but I'm noticing certain ones developing ~ and worsening with age!

It's the weirdest feeling; somewhat similar to panic. I almost literally can't sit still unless I've got food in my hands. Not sure how to combat that! Fortunately, it usually just hits me for a day or two at the beginning. During the day, when there's stuff to get done, I can much more easily distract myself, but evenings are rough.  I'll admit to having a long, drawn-out "second supper" on Saturday night.

Followed closely, of course, by Mothers Day!!  We ate lunch at our favourite little Chinese food place which was having a smorg for the occasion, and I was still not hungry at 7:00pm when we finally had supper. I did eat, but only very little, figuring if I didn't have anything, I'd likely have problems falling asleep.

And then I had a package of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in the evening. You know, just to make sure! ;)

Until the Saturday night grazing and the Sunday afternoon smorg, my weight was EXACTLY the same all week as it had been last week ~ right down to the tenth of a pound! I was up considerably on Monday morning (surprise, surprise!), but after behaving myself for the remainder of the time till weigh-in, I managed to drop ALMOST back to last week's weight. Not quite. I'm up 0.4 lb, but I can deal with that, especially since it's very normal for me to gain a bit at this point in my monthly cycle anyway.

I'm doing really well with the water challenge, so I think that's probably helping.  I've always been a "heavy drinker," but this past week I've been making very sure I get in my full 64 ozs/2L daily.

This coming week will be a challenge as my SIL/cousin and her family, as well as another single SIL, will be spending the weekend at our house!! Might have to do a bit of fasting before and after... ;)

Checkin' in ~ May MY Weigh

2011-05-04T06:00:00.108-05:00

Well, I have to say, the first few days of this challenge have been a raving success. I'm already down 2.2 lbs from my challenge-starting weight!!

Now if only I could figure out what I'd done differently...

Before the snowstorm obliterated our satellite signal last Saturday night (yes, we had a blizzard on April 30th! It dumped 4" on us, and all the way up to 20" in nearby areas!!), The Man and I watched the first half of some obscure rugby movie about a delinquent kid.

Despite the relative forgettableness of the movie, one line stood out and I think it will stick with me for quite some time. It was after the team had suffered a loss as a result of the delinquent kid's selfish attitude. The coach was punishing the entire team, not just the loner who figured he should be the star. The team was running laps up and down the bleachers, and while they ran to the point of complete exhaustion, he had them repeat this phrase:

Practice don't make perfect; practice makes permanent.

And he's right. Regardless of how popular the saying is, practice really doesn't make perfect. There will always be mistakes. There will always be circumstances we didn't or couldn't plan for. But the longer we practice something ~ whether it's rugby technique or eating habits or anything else ~ the more likely it will become a permanent habit.

It's a no-brainer, really, and yet I found it kinda profound!

I guess one of the things I've avoided in the last week is evening snacking. I think, since last Wednesday, I haven't had a SINGLE evening snack, not even just a piece of fruit! That's a virtually unheard-of practice in this house!! I have also been more carefully watching my portions ~ generally trying to give myself less than I would normally have dished out, and not going back for seconds, no matter how wonderful it tastes! Or how not full my stomach still feels afterwards.

So if for the next 4 weeks I continue to conscientiously practice portion-control and limit my evening snacking to special occasions ONLY, I will be well on the way to permanence!

It's been a while...

2011-05-01T06:05:00.025-05:00

I haven't missed counting points. I haven't missed following a strict weekly eating plan. I haven't missed disallowing certain foods. I haven't missed stepping on the scale. I haven't missed obssessing about food, eating, and weight.

I haven't missed the regular weight-loss/gain postings, that's for sure. I haven't missed the challenges. And quite honestly, I haven't even missed all the positive, encouraging, "You can DO it!" comments from well-meaning Internet strangers and friends, either.

The past almost-year since my last post here has been very freeing in some ways. I've loved not spending every waking minute thinking about food, planning meals, counting points, fretting about how to lose the extra weight from a binge night or two, and being disappointed when I stepped on the scale.

But I have missed being lighter.

Today, I weigh 170.8. I am 12 lbs heavier than I was at the end of last August (roughly when I posted last) and almost 16 lbs heavier than I was exactly a year ago.

Obviously, this TOTAL FREEDOM thing isn't such a great idea. Of course, maybe that's because it might have been more appropriately called RECKLESS ABANDON...

I just wish I could find a balance between being conscientious about my food choices, and my eating and exercise habits, without feeling like that's ALL I think about. I have been saying this for years ~ to the point that I'm sick and tired of saying it and hearing myself say it ~ but whatever I do needs to feel natural in order to become a habit. All these counting, figuring, and abstinence plans are not NATURAL. They work, but none of the programs and systems I've tried so far, no matter how successful they might have been, were just not something I wanted to have to adhere to for the rest of my life.

So, all this to say, I guess I'm back at square one. This month will be about trying to start some habits (AGAIN) that feel good, feel natural, will be good FOR me, and that I can see myself sticking with for a lifetime.

Sure. No problem, right??

Check-in Wednesday

2010-08-11T04:39:00.004-05:00

Had I done what I said I would do and controlled myself while camping ~ eating as much fruit and veggies as I could instead of chips, crackers, and chocolate-covered granola bars ~ I might have actually had a significant weight loss.

As is, I lost the 2.6 I was up from two weeks ago (the gain I refused to report last week!), so that pretty much proves it was entirely water weight. I'm trying not to think about how much better a loss I could've had if I'd eaten better while we were gone.

It's tough though, while camping. I had brought some fresh beans from the garden as well as a bag of oranges, but that was pretty much it. My little camper fridge and our cooler were full of "main course" things and I just didn't have room for NON-ESSENTIALS like healthy stuff!! ;)

So I'm happy the water weight is gone and I'm trying to be very self-disciplined this week because I've got another rough food week comin' up...

Check-in Wednesday

2010-08-04T05:04:00.002-05:00

I did great with the fruits and veggies goal I spelled out in my last two posts until Sunday, but I struggled a little yesterday and Monday. They were busy days where what could be most easily grabbed out of the fridge or cupboard got eaten. Monday was particularly bad for veggies. (And for a bit of over-eating, I'll admit. But no bingeing!!) And that pesky TOM arrived yesterday, so I'm up a bit from Sunday's starting weight.

Okay, quite a bit, actually.

Alright, I'll be honest ~ I was shocked.

Let's just say, it was a lot of weight to gain in the mere 48 hours that separated Sunday's weigh-in from my regular weekly one yesterday morning. So, I'm not sure whether this is allowed or not, but I've decided I'm not recording a weight this week. It's so very obviously a water weight and next week's should be much more normal again.

Hopefully...

This coming week will be a challenge as I'll be spending most of it at a campsite. And everyone knows camping means eating somewhat LESS healthy than when you're at home. (Just a little!) And ~~lots~~ LOTS of snacking. At least two of the suppers I've planned will include salad, and I'm bringing bags of oranges, carrot sticks, and fresh-picked green beans for snacking, but it will be hard to choose those things over chips and chocolate-covered granola bars!!

Wish me luck!

Down & Dirty in 30 Challenge Kick-Off

2010-08-01T05:09:00.006-05:00

Okay, I've got my plan in place and I am ready to get DOWN & DIRTY this month! (Well, DOWN anyway!!)

The plan is really pretty simple: make sure I get a minimum of 5 servings of fruits and vegetables in each day.

The tricky part for ME is...

They MUST BE SOLID FOODS, not liquids!!

The temptation is to run out and buy a bunch of V8 and V8-Splash type juices and just drink my fruits and veggies, but what I'm going for here is not actually so much the vitamins, minerals, and fibre, but the feeling of a full stomach. You know, so there's not as much room for all the fat- and carb-laden stuff in my diet! And with fresh produce starting to come out of the garden, this should be relatively easy and inexpensive this month. Once the garden is done... well, I'll worry about that later!

On Wednesday's check-in, I vowed to have some handy little charts made up so I could better keep track of my fruit/veggie intake and it just so happens that my "poor man's BlackBerry" has a food diary mod! I won't be tracking all foods, I don't think, just the fruits and veggies I consume for each meal. There's also spots for type of activity and time, so that will be nice, too.

I'm starting this challenge off with a weight of 157.0, which is down 0.6 from Wednesday (yay!) and though I'm not sure what all the "dirty" part entails, I'm definitely planning on being DOWN in 30!!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2010-07-28T12:58:00.008-05:00

Not sure how it happened, but I'll take it:

I'm down 1.8 from last week!

And not only did the scale show 1.8 lower than last week, but I forgot to step on the scale till 12:30 this afternoon, so this is not even my first-thing-in-the-morning weight! What a happy mid-day surprise!

It's a great weigh (haha, get it?!) to go into the new Sisterhood challenge with ~ mostly because it's lower than I thought my August 1 starting weight would be! I've decided not to participate on a team this time though, despite it being a team challenge. That strategy seems to bring out my self-destructive tendency more than any other, and I've hated myself for letting down my teams in the past. So I'm goin' this one alone, but true to my word from last week, I have decided on a plan and am starting to follow it already.

The plan is really pretty simple: make sure I get a minimum of 5 servings of fruits and veggies in each day. And they must be SOLID FOOD, not liquids!! The temptation is to run out and buy a bunch of V8 and V8-Splash type juices and just drink my vitamins, but what I'm going for here is not actually so much the vitamins, minerals, and fibre, but the feeling of a full stomach. You know, so there's not as much room for all the fat- and carb-laden stuff in my diet!

With fresh produce starting to come out of the garden, this should be relatively inexpensive right now, but once that's over, I think I'm going to do what I've been talking about doing for YEARS already and start buying prepared veggie platters at the grocery store each week. I've done it once or twice in the past, and then it always gets eaten. And yet if I pay a little less for whole veggies and bunches of veggies, almost invariably half of it ends up getting thrown out because it got neglected and went moldy. Blecgh.

So that's my marvelous plan. I just need to make myself up some cute little printed-out charts to keep track and make sure I'm doing what I promised to do! They'll be ready when the challenge starts on Sunday!!

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDoS FINALE!

2010-07-21T05:52:00.004-05:00

I'll admit it: I'm not happy with my results this week. Partly because I gained, but mostly because I don't really understand why. Coming off a week of TOM, getting plenty of exercise, watching how I ate....

I was expecting to see a loss of 1.4, not a gain.

So I end off this 8-week challenge with an overall loss of just 3 lbs. Blah.

I think it's time I admit I need to follow some kind of concrete PLAN again if I really want to see results. "Everything in moderation" is all fine and dandy, but I need more than just a general concept in my head. I need to know for certain BEFORE the food gets to my mouth how "moderation" is supposed to look! And I need to be able to evaluate each day, each meal, quantitatively and qualitatively, so I don't just think I've probably done poorly or "okay," but so that I know exactly where I did well and where I need to improve next meal.

So that will be my goal for the next week. Establishing a plan and, if necessary, making myself a little chart or journal to fill out each day.

I hereby vow to have a

battle-ready plan of attack

formulated by the time the

next challenge begins!

"Normal."

2010-07-16T05:55:00.006-05:00

"Normal" is such a funny word isn't it?

Such a relative, subjective word. In a way, COMPLETELY meaningless, and yet we fully rely on it.

During my most successful weight-loss period (April to July, 2009 ~ lost 20 lbs in 15 weeks), I followed the Setting Captives Free eating plan. You know, the one I obviously can't decide if I'm going to follow ever again! I've sometimes had posted in my sidebar, but then I remove it because I'm not following it.... tsk, tsk.

Anyway, it's like this:

Monday ~ liquids only

Tuesday ~ half day

Wednesday ~ liquids only

Thursday ~ normal

Friday ~ fasting/liquids only

Saturday ~ normal

Sunday ~ half day

"Half days" are where you literally eat only half what you normally would. Fasting or liquids only days are pretty self-explanatory, but you still eat one light meal per day (I always ate supper). And "normal" days are when you eat like you normally would.

At the beginning, I often wondered what the Setting Captives Free people who thought up this eating plan meant by "normal." Both the "normal" and the "half" days DEPEND on knowing what they mean by NORMAL!!

Do they mean "normal," as in, what and how I have eaten until now? or do they mean "normal," as in, what I would like my normal to look like in the future?

For me, the temptation is to use those "normal" days as an excuse to fall into the comfort of bad habits and over-eating. Because that would be NORMAL. I believe, however, that that is NOT the idea behind "normal" days.

Ideally, these "normal" days are supposed to look like we'd like them to look ~ you know, like how they'll look when we're skinny! Eating anything in moderation, but never over-eating, certainly no routine fast foods or unhealthy snacking, and making sure it's our allowing our bodies letting us know when it's time to refuel rather than our habits and emotions.

I had a pretend conversation with someone as I walked one day ~ someone who, a few months down the road, of course, was commenting on how great I looked and asking whatever had been my secret. As I conversed and explained how I got to looking so fabulous, I realized that I was sharing a testimony. My testimony. My path out of slavery to gluttony, of taking up my cross and dying to self-indulgence, of kicking the devil and his lies to the curb, and giving my angels an excuse to party every day. To the point where the party ran non-stop.

I noticed, as I spoke, that my idea of "normal" eating in the future looks very different from the days I often have. And I realized, that continuing to allow "THOSE DAYS" will only delay ~ and most likely cancel ~ that future.

I'll never get to the point where "normal" for me is fruit and whole wheat toast for breakfast, homemade trailmix for a mid-morning snack, a bowl of vegetable soup or a salad for lunch, celery sticks with cheese for an afternoon snack, a small well-balanced supper, and a small yogurt for evening snack... That's NEVER gonna happen if I'm having a stack of pancakes in the afternoon, two greasy, deep-fried chicken breasts and fries smothered in gravy for supper, and wolfing it down like there's no tomorrow ~ simply because that WAS my normal!

I need a NEW normal.

How would YOU like your "normal" to look?

Let's you and me

LIVE OUR NEW NORMAL

today!!

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDoS Wk 7

2010-07-14T08:15:00.002-05:00

I can't believe there's only one week left! I started out this challenge strong, but have definitely slacked off. Oh sure, I could blame 3 weeks of illness and a couple weeks of TOM, but really, it's my own apathy.

I waffle between wanting to keep this up and wanting to "go it alone." I dream of being able to forget about THINKING constantly about eating, forget about weekly weigh-ins, forget about even stepping on the scale...

Ahhhh, the impossible dream.

::sigh::

I found the 0.2 I lost last week. It was TOM. I mowed lawn for an hour again (4 tough miles), did 10 miles of bike riding ~ 8 of them in ONE day!! ~ did one 2-mile run, and walked the same distance twice. A good week exercise-wise again, but I've been very lack-lustre with meals lately. I find myself just not really caring, not being very organized, and spending more on convenience-type foods than I normally do. Which means, of course, less healthy, well-balanced meals than I normally serve.

I'm gonna need a serious kick in the pants if I want to finish this challenge with a decent loss!! My original goal for these 8 weeks was 11 lbs. Then I shifted down to 8. Now I'll be really happy with just 6!

But that means I need to lose 1.6 lbs this coming week. It's not a lot, but considering how much I've been caring about losing weight lately, it seems like a formidable goal!!!

How are YOU doing with your goals for this challenge?

Perseverance and Challenges

2010-07-08T06:19:00.003-05:00

*This is a retooled post from last summer, but goodness knows, I need the reminder!!

Today I want to talk about perseverance. Something I'm quite unfamiliar with, actually.

Did you know perseverance means MORE than just hanging on?

Simply hanging on ~ which is more closely defined as endurance ~ is often little more than a fear of letting go or falling. True perseverance is endurance combined with absolute assurance and certainty that what we are looking for is going to happen.

Perseverance is the supreme effort of refusing to believe we might fail.
How many of you have thought about perseverance that way? (Okay, don't tell me -- I'd hate to find out I'm the only one who hasn't!!) I never once thought that perseverance could mean more than just "keepin' on keepin' on." I have certainly never refused to believe I might fail. Heck, I PLAN for failure! Just like a pre-nup agreement, there are always several "but if, then that" loop-holes when I'm setting goals for myself in the weight loss/healthy living department.

How awful and faithless to prepare oneself for the worst even before committing to the best!!
I need to make a concentrated, conscientious effort to switch from just hanging on (read: maintaining) to truly persevering.

I've gotten lazy. I've been content to just hang on. I've gotten out of the habit of following the eating plan on my sidebar, never really tried terribly hard to re-establish the habit, and as a result, my weight hasn't changed much since last summer. There are so many partly-it's-due-to's, but mostly it's my own apathy. I just haven't cared enough to persevere.

I want to start caring again.

And today is always the best day to start making changes for the better!!
I've got nine weeks of summer left and I'd really like that pesky middle digit in my weight to be one number lower by the time school starts again ~ a goal of another 8.5 lbs. There will definitely be challenges along the way, but what month doesn't have them?!

I've come to realize that where eating is concerned, self-control at each and every meal is a challenge, regardless of whether it's a normal, everyday routine meal or a potluck lunch or a weekend family gathering at the lake. The challenge is controlling myself around food, not where or why or what kind of food!

If I choose to persevere rather than simply endure, I should manage just fine whether at home or at the lake. Whether alone or surrounded by friends. And whether there's dessert or not!

How about you? Are you persevering or just hanging on?

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDoS Wk 6

2010-07-07T05:23:00.007-05:00

Wow, I can't believe we're at week SIX of this challenge already!! Partly because, where has the time gone??!! And partly because, dang it, my primary AND secondary goals for this challenge are now out of reach!!

Well, I'm still moving in a downward trend, so I guess I can't really complain. It's only 0.2 this week, but that's still FORWARD PROGRESS, despite the pace. At least I'm not reversing!

My in-laws were out from Thursday evening till Sunday afternoon and that always presents eating challenges. Not only do I cook differently when we've got company (we almost never have dessert after supper, but when there's company, we almost always do!), but invariably when the in-laws visit, there's treats. This time it was watermelon with rollkuchen a few times (which are bad enough by themselves, but we usually dip them in syrup!!), and a dozen Timmie's donuts, BOTH of which I have trouble controlling myself around!!

But, I also got in a fair bit more exercise this past week than I have in a long time.

Thursday: mowed through some seriously overgrown lawn for a good two hours in the sweltering mid-afternoon heat!
Saturday: went for a 2-mile walk with my father-in-law in the evening
Sunday: went for a 2-mile jog/walk after the in-laws left in the afternoon
Monday: mowed lawn for 2-1/2 hours (fortunately, it was a cloudy, breezy day this time!)

So that's roughly TWENTY MILES of exercise!

Yet I still only lost 0.2 lbs. Hmmmmm.

I guess THAT means....

...I definitely ate more than I should have!

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDoS wk 5

2010-06-30T07:12:00.004-05:00

Down 0.4.

I really thought it'd be more since I was considerably lower on the weekend and have controlled myself quite well again. (Only small snacks and only on two evenings!!) I guess the loss earlier was probably due to a slight, medication-induced loss of appetite. It's apparently hard on the digestive system, but fortunately I was given what seems to have been very good advice and the side-effects have been kept to a minimum. I haven't noticed anything since Saturday.

And exercise has been virtually non-existent in recent weeks because of all the rain and the pneumonia, but I mowed lawn for an hour on Monday afternoon ~ without coughing a single time!! I have a couple more hours of mowing to look forward to yet this week, providing we don't get much rain, so this week, I could get some good miles in if the forecast is wrong! My lungs seem clear enough to handle the sudden surge of physical activity, so I've got no excuse now. (well, except for the constant downpours, of course...)

My in-laws are coming out tomorrow night and staying till Sunday afternoon, so controlling how much I eat and WHAT I eat will be a little more challenging, but I think I can handle it.

Weight-in Wednesday: SDoS wk 4

2010-06-23T05:15:00.004-05:00

Man, I tell ya, I am gettin' really tired of being sick!

This past weekend my cold had a resurgence ~ or I caught a new one without having fully gotten rid of the old one ~ and I've spent the last four days pursuing various vain efforts to soothe an incredibly sore throat. The glands in my throat are swollen to the point of popping and my ears and sinuses are STILL plugged.

We're goin' on THREE WEEKS already, and yes, I'm FINALLY seeing the doctor right before noon today. I don't believe in going to the doctor for coughs and colds, BUT... I detected two large white spots on my right tonsil yesterday. No more messin' around.

Anyhoo.... as a result of all this nonsense, I've been too tired and/or out of it to care much about meals. And swimming lessons are still wreaking havoc with the supper hour this week, so once again, both factors are reflected in my weight. But I'm still down by 0.8, which means I've lost 4 lbs in this challenge already! I'd hoped to be a little further, but considering my health over the last 3 weeks and that it's been raining and too wet to walk/run most of the month, I'm happy.

And, there are only 3 days of school left and then the girls and I dive into what will hopefully be a healthy and active summertime routine!!

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDoS Wk 3

2010-06-16T05:15:00.003-05:00

I didn't lose this week. I gained. It's only 0.4, but it's amazing how much of a set-back that is in terms of TIME-SENSITIVE goals!!

I was a little disappointed that I hadn't at least stayed the same, especially since I know I did well with portion control and allowing my stomach to growl between meals. Despite it being that T.O.M., I did none of the frantic gorging that often seems to accompany that week. In fact, I believe I snacked in the evening just ONCE this last week!!! Pretty proud of that, actually.

But I've also been sick for the last week and a half. Which explains not really caring WHAT I ate, even if I controlled my portions and snacking impulses relatively well. It also explains the lack of exercise ~ normal breathing alone has been challenging enough! I did mow lawn twice ~ which amounts to a combined total of 3.5 hours of pushing a mower ~ and go for one or two 2-mile walks. So maybe I didn't do too badly in that area either!

So I'm not too unhappy with the little gain, mostly because I know it didn't come from a lack of self-control for a change!! But it is going to make my goal for this particular challenge a little more, well...

...challenging!

Weigh-in Wednesday: SDos Wk 2

2010-06-09T05:03:00.004-05:00

Well, I'll admit it: I did even WORSE sticking to the plan this past week.

For the first half, anyway. I'm still having a real problem with evening snacking. Actually, evening GORGING is probably a more accurate word for what transpired on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday evenings.

By Thursday morning, I felt so disgusting that it wasn't a problem at all to do without food 'til suppertime. (I switched my week around a bit so that my kids wouldn't see me ~~starving myself~~ fasting) Not only that, but I was incredibly disgusted with myself when I stepped on the scale for the "fun" of it, and discovered that in just 48 hours, I'd packed on 2.8 lbs!!! I was heavier than my starting weight 2 weeks ago!! Ugh.

Needless to say, I desperately needed to be very self-disciplined for the rest of the week. I managed to pull off a loss from last week, but once again, it could have been SO much more impressive if I'd been sticking with the program the entire time!

Technically, I lost a total of 4 lbs this week, but because almost all of that weight got packed on AFTER last week's weigh-in, it only amounts to a loss of 1.2 this week. And I know, I know, you're going to say, "Hey, a loss is a loss ~ you did great!" but I know I failed at controlling myself until I got desperate.

Don't get me wrong ~ I'm thankful for the loss, but moderation is never going to be a habit if it only happens out of desperation!

In my Bible reading this last week, I came across a sentence in Ecclesiastes that kinda pricked my conscience a little: "The man who fears God will avoid all extremes." (Ecc. 7:18b, NIV) So in other words, bingeing, and then starving to counter the effects of the bingeing, is evidence that I am not completely under God's control.

Definitely something to chew on this week...

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ SDoS wk 1

2010-06-02T05:35:00.004-05:00

Well, there was a surprise waiting for me on the bathroom scale this morning! A GOOD surprise, for once!!

I think I only exercised once ~ a 2-mile walk on Saturday evening.

And I had at least 3 days were I didn't and/or couldn't stick to my eating plan this week ~ which, considering it was my first week back ON the plan, isn't a great start!! I COMPLETELY abandoned the plan on Friday and Saturday due to an unforeseen, 2-day solo trip to a city 7 hours away for a funeral.

This trip ended up including a 41st anniversary dinner with my parents at The Keg. After the pre-entrée salad and hunk of bread, I REALLY didn't need a gigantic, stuffed, baked potato and half-cow grilled to perfection...

But I ate most of both anyway.

I ALSO didn't need any dessert.

But dad was goin' a little crazy on his anniversary, and who was I to refuse? That would have been a horrible affront ~ their one and only child refusing to join the celebration!!

Fortunately, he ordered three spoons and only one piece of Billy Miner Pie. OH. MY. GOODNESS!

And I'm not even an ice cream-lover!

Anyway, now where was I....?

Oh yes, the surprise:

I'm DOWN 2.4 POUNDS!!!

I can only imagine how much better I'd have done if I'd stuck to the plan!!

And without last night's bingeing...

Time to Restart. (AGAIN!)

2010-05-25T10:39:00.009-05:00

Man, I get so tired of this cycle. I feel like a broken record.

Twice in the last 6 months I've been down to 154.6 and twice I've bounced back up, once just a few pounds; this time 7.8. You do the math.

And before you say, "Maybe this is just where your body needs to be," let me just say, I KNOW IT ISN'T!! I KNOW I've slacked off and taken up ROUTINE evening snacking again. I KNOW I've allowed seconds (and sometimes even thirds) when I shouldn't have. I KNOW I've over-eaten at times when I wasn't even hungry to begin with. I completely deserve this latest weight gain.

But, I guess the only true failure is the one who doesn't even try, so here I am, trying again. I do have a specific goal for this challenge, but it seems like if I say it out loud, I'm bound to sabotage myself, so I'm going to try keeping it a secret this time!

I've decided to go back to the ol' Becoming a Woman of Moderation eating plan (posted in my sidebar) that lost me all that weight last spring. Since I seem to have self-discipline issues, I obviously need a specific eating plan. I'd love to be able to say I can control myself ~ that I only eat when I'm hungry and only eat as much as I need to remove the hunger pangs ~ but I just haven't developed that ability yet. So I'm going with this plan. Fortunately, though it includes regular fasting days, it doesn't actually force me to give up any of the foods I enjoy (even the junk food!). It worked for me once; I believe it will work again.

Here's to a skinnier summer than ever before!

Spring Fling FINAL Weigh-in

2010-04-21T07:18:00.003-05:00

I suck. I did SO incredibly horribly this challenge.

I'm up another 1.4 lbs.

Which means, over the course of this 8-week challenge, I've GAINED 3.8 lbs.

Sorry, A-Team. We all seemed to lose enthusiasm as the weeks went on, and I take responsibility for not being more encouraging and uplifting. It seems like most of us have been in a funk over the last several weeks, and now WE'RE "da fools" that boasted supremacy in the beginning! Dang it, I hate failing like this, but...

...What do all ya'll do when you find you just don't care anymore?

Spring Fling Week 7 weigh-in

2010-04-14T08:30:00.005-05:00

Down a measely 0.2.

TOM appetite and bloating.

That is all.

Spring Fling ~ Week 6 Weigh-in

2010-04-07T05:13:00.000-05:00

No change this week.

Except I'm not swallowing razor blades anymore. Which is, of course, a wonderful improvement from last week!!

Turns out I had a pretty bad case of tonsilitis, of all things! Finally sought medical attention Thursday afternoon and started noticing some improvement late Friday.

Went for a short little walk Friday night just to get out of the house, but Saturday my body was struggling with the harsh antibiotics, so I stayed pretty close to the bathroom. Sunday, the soreness was almost completely gone, but I went for my usual two-mile walk and I'm sure it took almost twice as long as it normally does. I was completely wiped out!! I NAPPED afterwards, for Pete's sake! I NEVER nap.

So it would seem recovery time from a fever-ridden illness increases with age!

Amazingly, I did the same walk less than 24 hours later (Monday morning), and it was like I'd never been sick. Took the same amount of time as normal, and I felt great afterwards.

So that's my excuse for not losing any weight this week: didn't eat as much as usual, but didn't move for four straight days either.

Spring Fling ~ Week 5 weigh-in

2010-03-31T07:59:00.006-05:00

I'm sick today ~ had a fever since yesterday, didn't sleep well for more than 3 hours last night because of what I'm guessing is an ear infection, and I'm cranky.

Grrrr.

And I'm up 0.6, dang it.

Looking for insight, ideas, and/or inspiration?

2010-03-25T06:47:00.000-05:00

Then I'd encourage you to visit this post over at my cousin/SIL Andrea's weight-loss blog. She's lost 55 lbs over the last 9 months and she's taken the time to write out the recipe for her success. Definitely worth the read.

Spring Fling weigh-in #4

2010-03-24T06:50:00.004-05:00

Frustration reigns supreme today.

I'm up 2.8.

And naturally (we all know it but never want to admit it), there's no one and nothing to blame but ME.

I think some of this gain is a carry-over from last week's TOM downrightcrazyinsatiable appetite. But mostly it reflects a lack of self-discipline over the last two weeks. I'm unmotivated and quite frankly, I find myself not caring.

There. I said it.

My name is Tammi, and I just don't care about weight loss very much right now.

But I know this isn't helping my A-Team sistahs (or my waistline), so I need to DECIDE to be motivated.

Waiting to FEEL motivated is a fatal flaw in weight-loss efforts or any other goal-setting exercise. If we base motivation on feelings, it's only temporary ~ and often won't be there at all!! But if we base motivation on knowledge, and decide to persevere regardless of how we feel, that's when we'll continually experience success.

I can choose to wait to feel like turning down snacks, or I can choose to turn them down because I know it's smarter, healthier, and more character-building than the alternative. The former might happen every now and again, but the latter is a conscious decision which is the basis for a permanent lifestyle change.

One is completely within our control. The other is just wishful thinking. (Seriously, who can honestly claim they feel like NOT snacking??!!)

So today ~ and only today (we'll worry about tomorrow, well, tomorrow!) ~ I'm going to choose to practice what I know is good, wise, and healthy. Because waiting until the motivated feeling to do so strikes again could take a while!

Spring Fling Weigh-in #3

2010-03-17T06:29:00.001-05:00

Ugh. That dang TOM thing!

Although I can't really blame that for the over-eating, I CAN blame it for the increased appetite.

The downrightcrazyinsatiable appetite.

I can also blame it for water retention.

So no change for me this week, sadly.

I'm happy about the amount of exercise I got though ~ a 2-mile walk/run, two 3-mile walk/runs, a 2-mile bike ride, and a 3-mile walk. And Days 1 and 2 of Week 5 of the 200 Sit-Ups challenge. I feel REALLY good about the amount of exercise I got!!

I had to rethink my strategy for the Push-ups, Sit-ups, and Squats challenges this week though. Not only were they starting to take up a lot of time each morning, but with getting back into jogging, I find my shoulders and thighs are getting enough of a work-out right now!

So I'm pursuing the goal of 200 sit-ups IN ONE SHOT for March 31. This morning, I did 265 in 9 sets, but they'll have me doing 368 in 9 sets before the end of the challenge. I guess they figure if you can do that many with a few one-minute breaks here and there, then you should easily able to handle 200 without a break!

The push-ups I'll work on this summer, once running doesn't tire out my shoulders any more (that always sounds so weird! Does running do that to anyone else's shoulders?!), and the squats I'll pick up next winter, once I can't run outdoors anymore.

So it wasn't exactly the stellar week I was planning on having. I was definitely not the boost I was hoping to be for The A-Team, but I can't help but be a little happy with myself in the exercise department, even if it didn't translate to a loss this week!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Progress Report

2010-03-16T06:15:00.000-05:00

Tuesday
Breakfast: small piece toast w/Nutella, 1 c. orange juice, coffee w/skim milk
Late morning: 2 bites ham as I made these muffins. Made some 1-bite mini-muffins with leftover batter ~ ate two.
Lunch: small serving Kraft Macaroni & Cheese, 1/2 c. skim milk
Afternoon: 2 mugs tea w/honey, handful homemade croutons, 4 soda crackers, 2 slices cheddar
Supper: 1 serving Shepherd's Pie (loaded with peas, carrots, onions, and mushrooms), 1 c. ice tea
Evening: 1 c. ice tea, nacho chips w/homemade guacamole

Wednesday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. orange juice, coffee w/skim milk
2.25 mi/3.6 km: 30 min
(1/8-mile warm-up, four intervals jogging 1/4-mile and walking 1/4-mile, 1/8-mile cool-down)
Early Lunch: two Maple Bacon Muffins w/a little margarine, 2 thin slices cheddar, 1 c. skim milk
Afternoon: large Tim Horton's coffee w/two creams (rrrrrolled up the rrrim and didn't win, dang it)
Supper (meatless!): one serving Santa Fe Beans & Rice, three fried 6" corn tortillas, two large servings raw cucumber slices
Dancin' with the girls: 15 min
Whew. Who knew Go Fish kids' tunes were such a work-out?!
Evening: 1 mug green tea, 4 Mexican Crinkle cookies

Thursday
200 Sit-ups Challenge: 15 min
(200 in 5 sets, woo-hoo! You'd think I'd be done, right? WRONG! They want you to be able to do a combined total of about 368 in 9 sets by the end of the challenge!! Sheesh.)
Breakfast: 2 Maple Bacon Muffins, coffee w/skim milk
Mid-Morning: two slices toast (both with margarine; one with honey, too.), 1 c. skim milk
Lunch: small leftover helping Shepherd's Pie (Fidget ate very little of her lunch yesterday, it seems!), 2 c. skim milk, SIX Mexican Crinkles

TOM must be just around the corner because I can't seem to cram enough food into my pie-hole! I apologize if that's TMI, but it would certainly explain things...

Supper: two servings Lemon Tuna Spaghetti, one large serving cooked peas, 1-1/2 c. ice tea
Evening (had a friend over for coffee): 1 apple oatmeal muffin, 2 mugs green tea (one w/honey; one without)
Later evening: 1 c. skim milk, two handfuls soda crackers

Wow. I have been rotten today.

Friday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)
3.25 mi/5.2 km: 50 min
(1/8-mile warm-up and cool-down, SIX intervals of jogging/walking alternately each quarter-mile. Not nearly as torturous as I expected it to be!!)
Lunch: small toast crust w/margarine, 1 slice cheddar, and a chunk of red pepper; 2 stalks celery w/peanut butter; 1 c. V8 Splash
Afternoon: 1 thin slice cheddar, 3 soda crackers
Supper: 1 chunk farmer sausage, 8 cheddar & potato perogies w/fat-free sour cream, 1-1/2 c. ice tea, and a large cereal bowl of popcorn for dessert!
Evening: 1 large bowl Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal w/skim milk, 2 c. skim milk, SIX Mexican Crinkles!!

Dang. I did SO well until the girls went to bed, and then.... Crud.

Saturday
200 Sit-ups Challenge: 10 min
(Week 5, Day 1 ~ 219 in 5 sets. Ooof.)
Morning: coffee w/skim milk
Early lunch: 1 mug hot chocolate (made mostly w/skim milk, but a little leftover coffee, too), 1 sausage & egg sandwich on a hamburger bun w/margarine and a slice of process cheese, 1 c. V8 Splash
2.5 miles/4 km: 30 min
(the girls and I went for our first bike ride of the year! It was a memorable one!!)
Afternoon: 1 slice cheddar, 1 Maple Bacon Muffin w/margarine
Supper: half of a small serving of leftover Santa Fe Beans & Rice, half a large cucumber (hubby was coming home unexpectedly and I planned to eat with him once the girls were in bed, but I was hungry at my normal supper time!)
2nd supper: 1/4 small deluxe pepperoni pizza w/some parm cheese, 1 c. ice tea, 6 TimBits

Sunday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)
Lunch: small serving leftover Cordon Bleu Casserole Supreme, 1 slice bread w/margarine & homamade saskatoon jam
3.25 miles: 50 min
(1/8-mile warm-up and cool-down, 6 intervals of jogging/walking alternately each quarter-mile.)
Supper: 1 c. Lemon Chicken Soup, 1 slice cheese toast, 1 c. ice tea
Evening: 1 handful plain ripple chips, 1 c. skim milk, 3 Mexican Crinkles

Dang it. That's it, those cookies are going back into the basement freezer!!!

Monday
200 Sit-ups Challenge: 20 min
(Week 5, Day 2 ~ 242 in 9 sets)
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)
3.25 miles: 55 min
(walked)
Lunch: 1 leftover homemade egg mcmuffin, 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: 2 servings fried fish, 1 large serving Crispy Potato Cubes w/fat-free sour cream, 1 large serving tossed salad w/dressing, 2 c. ice tea, 1 small ice cream sandwich

Well, it's definitely a TOM week. The voracious appetite and water retention are going to kill me at weigh-in tomorrow, but thank goodness, the exercise has been really good this week!

Total exercise time: 4 hr, 35 min (avg: 39 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate/heavy

I need your advice. {PLEASE! I'm desperate!!!!}

2010-03-13T07:49:00.009-06:00

How do you combat the munchies?

When the kids are all in bed, hubby's not around, you've got the remote all to yourself and two or three glorious hours before you need to crawl into bed...

how do you keep yourself from eating

NON-STOP

during that time?

This is, like, the last hurdle. Control at mealtimes is fairly consistent. Exercise is fairly consistent. But snacking? Out of control.

Some nights I do really well and I can stick to a mug or two of tea, but if I allow ANY food to cross my lips, it's like the dam bursts and I just can't stop shoving grub into my pie hole. It seriously becomes a frantic feeding frenzy! I am not kidding. This weird feeling of desperation sets in and with the end of each snack comes this intense "seek and destroy" sensation and it doesn't go away until I'm back on the couch. With another snack.

I probably need extensive therapy, but what do YOU guys do in situations like that? (please tell me you've experienced this at least once in your life!)

A happy surprise!

2010-03-12T15:09:00.006-06:00

I rarely measure myself, but after my 3-mile jog/walk this morning I did, just for the fun of it. It was a good surprise!

Even though I've only lost 11.6 lbs since June 6, 2009, which is the last time I took and recorded my measurements,

my waist is down 2 inches
my bust is down 2 inches (my undergarment size hasn't changed though, so that means I'm losing that pesky BACK FAT!)
and my waist was down 3 inches!

Woo-hoo!!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2010-03-10T06:47:00.004-06:00

Fortunately, with the help of two liquids days between Thursday and yesterday, and some VERY small food portions, I'm down 3.4 lbs.

UNFORTUNATELY, though I wasn't home for weigh-in last week, I stepped on the scale once I got home and I was UP 2.6 from my last official weigh-in.

Fortunately, this means I'm still down 0.8 overall for this challenge. And my absence from the weigh-in last week was actually better for my team than if I'd been around to step on my own scale and report.

Unfortunately, because I'm only down 0.8, which is less than the average rate I was hoping to maintain for this challenge, reaching my goal is going to be quite the challenge.

Fortunately, my fellow A-Team members are very forgiving and encouraging! So now that I'm home, refocused, and working with my team...

...so let the butt-kicking begin!!!!

I like the results of my really hard work this week (especially that I started running again this last week) and once I get back into my sit-ups/push-ups/squats challenge ~ which, quite honestly, I'd kinda forgotten about since getting home from mom and dad's ~ I'm expecting consistently good results.

I may need to break up the 100/200/200 challenge a bit though, and focus on achieving one at a time instead of all three together. The thought of doing these 3 exercises for AN HOUR (OR MORE!) has me not wanting to do them at all! So if I'm going to stay motivated, I think I need to work on just one at a time. Will give this some more thought and be on track by next weigh-in.

Progress Report

2010-03-09T03:58:00.018-06:00

Thursday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8
2.25 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey
Supper: small serving Mexican Macaroni & Cheese, 2 large servings tossed salad (mostly just romain and iceberg lettuce; a few tomato chunks) w/dressing and cubed mozzarella cheese
Evening: large helping ripple chips w/ketchup, 4 Mexican Crinkle cookies (similar to ginger snaps), 1 c. skim milk, 3 Reese's Peanut Butter Cups

Ugh. I was doing SO WELL. Why do I always self-sabotage like this??!!

Friday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)
Lunch: small serving leftover Mexican Macaroni & Cheese
Supper: 1 serving mashed potatoes w/gravy, 1/2 slice baked ham, 1 serving tossed salad w/dressing
Evening: 1 mug tea w/honey

Saturday
Breakfast: lots of coffee w/skim milk
2.25 miles: 35 min
(stopped to take a few pictures, but jogged a total of half a mile in 3 intervals ~ first run of the year, woo-hoo!)
Lunch: 1/4 cantaloupe
Afternoon: 2 small pieces pumpernickel rye w/lite cheese spread
Supper: 3/4 c. Main Course Soup, 2 garlic/cheese drop biscuits, 1-1/2 c. ice tea
Evening: 1 c. skim milk, 2 Mexican Crinkle cookies

Sunday
Breakfast: 1 slice rye toast w/margarine, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)
Lunch (potluck at church): had only one plate of food ~ not even close to heaping! ~ and almost a third was a sweet, tossed salad that had mandarins, dried cranberries and nuts in it, and a handful of carrot sticks. I did have two pieces of dessert, but considering it was a potluck, I think I did well today!!
Supper (friends over): 1 smallish serving Cordon Bleu Casserole Supreme, large helping tossed salad w/lite dressing, 1 c. ice tea, 1 slice Chocolate Cream Pie (1/12 of a 10" pie) w/whipping cream, 1 c. skim milk (some in my decaf)

Monday
Breakfast: 1 c. orange juice, 1 slice toast w/margarine & lite cheese spread, coffee w/skim milk
2.25 miles: 30 min
(1/8-mile warm-up, four intervals of jogging 3/16 and walking 5/16 of a mile, 1/8-mile cool-down)
Afternoon: 1 c. orange juice, 1 leftover garlic-cheese drop biscuit w/lite cheese spread
Supper: 1 small serving leftover Cordon Bleu Casserole Supreme, large helping tossed salad w/lite dressing, 1 c. ice tea

Woo-hoo! Only one binge evening!!! AND some jogging! Not much exercise time, but at least the intesity is increasing a little!!

Total exercise time: 1 hr, 40 min (avg: 14 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate/heavy

First run of the year!!

2010-03-06T14:43:00.004-06:00

(although I use that term rather loosely, since I walked three times more than I ran, but still....)

Oh, but it felt SO GOOD!! I was a little worried I'd have a hard time getting back into it. I've been walking consistently all winter, but I wasn't sure I'd be able to convince my body take up running agin.

It was a spur of the moment thing. I'd not actually planned on running and I was wearing my winter boots. They're light, have decent arch support and rubber soles (similar to these, but an older model), but still not exactly good running gear! I couldn't tell if the feeling in my knees and shins was because of inappropriate footwear or just the fact that it had been almost 5 months since I last ran ~ I decided to chalk it up to not being used to running!

But it was +5 (41F) and I couldn't help but give it a try. Heading south away from my house, I ran two intervals of 2 hydro pole-lengths (that's roughly 1/8-mile each time) and coming back I did FOUR in a row! Granted, I was working WITH the wind instead of against it then, and I'm sure that helped, but I was excited to have run a solid 1/4-mile all in one shot ~ and a half-mile in total.

Of course, if I'm all stiff tomorrow morning, I might not be quite as excited about it. Time will tell...

Weigh-in Wednesday

2010-02-17T02:54:00.005-06:00

Ugh. I'm up 0.6.

I knew it was likely to happen, and I still hate it, but three days of company just simply means I cook and eat differently for three days. Instead of a main course, one side dish, water for drinking, and no dessert, I make a main course, two side dishes (plus often have bread on the table, too), drink ice tea instead of water... and there's ALWAYS dessert! Sometimes more than one ~ and it often gets served after supper and again later in the evening.

::sigh::

It's really no wonder I'm up. I got in more exercising over the weekend than I would have if my parents hadn't been out (hubby was gone, so I only got to walk because there were still responsible adults in the house with my girls while I was gone!), but I have a problem with being the hostess and not eating a bit of everything on the table ~ even though I'm just hosting my parents. It just looks wrong for the hostess/cook to not eat the food she's serving!! I didn't over-eat, but I ate more than I would have if it had just been me and the girls all weekend.

So I gained a bit of weight. But now that things are back to normal and hubby will actually be home an extra day this weekend making an extra walk possible.... I should have no problems reporting a loss again next week!

Progress Report

2010-02-16T03:56:00.035-06:00

Tuesday
Breakfast: 2 c. apple juice, coffee w/skim milk, 1-1/2 slices toast w/margarine & lite cheese spread
3 miles: 55 min
(walked)
Late morning: 1/2 slice toast w/peanut butter & honey (Fidget's leftovers from breakfast!), coffee w/skim milk
Early afternoon: 1/2 leftover chicken & cheese quesadilla (half a large whole wheat tortilla), 4 pieces Green Chili Bites, salsa & fat-free sour cream for dipping
Supper: 1 serving Tuna Ring w/Cheese Sauce, 1 large serving honey-ginger carrots, 2 small scraps Fairy Bread
Evening: 1 can Coke, small handful nacho chips (took a cereal bowl-full, but put half back! I know, I'm just as surprised as you are!!)

Wednesday
Breakfast: 1/2 c. skim milk, coffee, 1 smallish slice toast w/margarine & honey
Lunch: 1 Zucchini Nut Muffin, 1 slice cheddar, leftover honey-ginger carrots (about 1 c.), 1 chocolate chip cookie, 1 piece Brownies
100/200/200: 15 min
(week 4, day 1. Oh man, my legs are jello-y!!)
Afternoon: 3 chocolate chip cookies, small piece Browines, 1 c. skim milk
Supper: 4 pieces Green Chile Bites, 3/4 leftover chicken & cheese quesadilla w/guacamole, refried beans, salsa & fat-free sour cream
Evening (had a friend over for cake & coffee 'cuz it's her birthday this week): decaf coffee w/skim milk, 1 piece Gingerbread Cake w/Caramel Cream Frosting

See? Today is a prime example of why I normally don't BAKE!!!!

Thursday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey, 1 c skim milk, coffee
Early Lunch: 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & honey (Fidget's breakfast leftovers!), 4 pieces Green Chili Bites w/salsa & fat-free sour cream (you have to understand, this is basically like a baked omelet with a green chile flavour!), 1 c. apple juice, coffee w/skim milk
2 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Afternoon: 1 apple, 2 slices cheddar, 1 mug hot cocoa (made w/skim milk)
Supper: 1-1/2 c. Chicken Noodle Soup, THREE leftover garlic biscuits, 2 slices cheddar, 1 piece Spiced Pecan Busy-Day Cake
Evening: 3 chocolate chip cookies, 1 c. skim milk

That's it ~ I'm putting all this dang baking back in the basement freezer!!! So far this week, I think my stomach has growled only once!

I'm REALLY gonna have to focus this weekend if I want to report a loss on Wednesday. My parents will be out from tomorrow supper till Monday lunch and we have a wedding reception to attend on Sunday night, so there will be PLENTY of opportunity to walk the path of indulgence!

Friday
100/200/200: 15 min
(week 4/day 1 repeated. I'm up to 67 push-ups, 148 sit-ups, and 131 squats ~ each in 5 sets.)
Breakfast: 1 serving porridge w/brown sugar and a bit of skim milk, coffee w/skim milk
Ice-chipping: 15 min
(couldn't get the shed door open enough to get the wheelbarrow in and out!)
Hauled & stacked firewood in basement: 25 min
(Hauled 4 wheelbarrows full. Load in shed, push to the house, dump in basement window, and repeat! Then stack the whole pile neatly once the hauling is done. Whew!)
Lunch: 1 Zucchini Nut muffin w/honey, 1-1/2 c. skim milk, the last 3 Green Chile Bites w/salsa, WAY too many soda crackers
Supper: 1 large-ish slice Italian-Style Meatloaf, 1 serving Crispy Potato Cubes, 1 serving honey-ginger carrots, 1 serving cucumber salad, 1 c. ice tea, two half-donuts (parents brought Timmies!), 1 c. skim milk, decaf coffee

Saturday
Brunch: 1 Pepper Molasses Cookie, 1/4 donut, fruit, 1 serving Sunday Brunch Casserole w/salsa, 1 c. orange juice, coffee w/skim milk
2 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Afternoon: 1 Boston Cream, fruit, coffee w/skim milk
Supper: 1 serving Glazed Ham, 1 serving coleslaw, 1 large serving Rice Pilaf w/Herbs, 1 tall glass ice tea
Evening: 1 piece Gingerbread Cake w/Caramel Cream Frosting, decaf coffee w/skim milk

Sunday
Breakfast: 1 Zucchini Nut muffin, 1/2 c. orange juice, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 c. Mixed Veggie Cream Soup, 1-1/2 slices cheese toast, 1 tall glass ice tea, THREE brownies!!
Supper (wedding reception): 2 small chocolates, 1 thin slice cooked ham, 1 scoop scalloped potatoes, 1 serving corn, 1 serving Caesar salad (w/almost no dressing and only one crouton), 1/2 bun w/margarine, 2 glasses punch, 1 c. coffee w/whitener, 1 small serving Skor Trifle

Monday
Breakfast: small piece Sunday Brunch Casserole, 1-1/2 slices toast (1 w/margarine & Nutella, 1/2 w/margarine & honey), coffee w/skim milk, 1/2 c. orange juice
2 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Lunch: small serving Italian Chicken over pasta, cucumber slices, 1 c. ice tea, way too many brownies, 1-1/2 c. skim milk.
Mom and dad left for home.
Afternoon: 1 Boston Cream donut, small mug coffee w/skim milk
Supper: tossed salad w/lite Sundried Tomato & Oregano dressing, 1 helping leftover Tuna Ring w/cheese sauce, 1 c. ice tea
Bust-a-move: 15 min
(serious sweatin' to some of the girls' new Go Fish tunes in between rounds of Old Maid!)
Evening: 1 stalk celery w/peanut butter

Well, I'm pretty sure I won't have lost weight this week. Probably gained a couple pounds again. Pretty much always happens with weekends like these.

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 50 min (avg: 33 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate

Weigh-In Wednesday

2010-02-10T06:00:00.001-06:00

Well.

I'm not sure how this happened.

I'm, ummm....

DOWN. THREE. POUNDS!!!

I don't really understand, but maybe reviewing the plans for this past week will give us some clues. My plan for this last week was:

remember to make sure my stomach growls at least twice a day ~~llll~~ ~~llll~~ ll (of 14)
complete week 3 of the 100/200/200 challenge (done)
at least 3 walks or 30-minute workouts lll (all walks again)

The previous week, I got in twice as many walks as my goal because hubby was home all week. This week, I barely got in my goal number because not only was hubby gone basically the entire time, but I had my oldest daughter home all week due to illness, so I couldn't even go on kindergarten days. :(

My biggest victory this week ~ by FAR ~ was in the snacking department, though portion control at mealtimes was a close second. I binged last Tuesday night, but other than that, I snacked only ONCE this past week! And all I had that night was a peanut butter & honey tortilla roll-up (made w/a large whole wheat tortilla). That's IT!! The ONLY evening snack in the last SEVEN days!!!! Needless to say, I'm pretty happy with the results. So happy, in fact, I may be tempted to try that strategy again! ;)

Unfortunately, I realized this morning was the final weigh-in for this challenge and while 3 lbs in one week is almost HALF my entire goal this time 'round, I actually lost just under half my 8-lb goal. Not too happy about that, but at least I'm still headed in the right direction ~ and finally workin' up some steam, too!!

Progress Report

2010-02-09T08:50:00.003-06:00

Tuesday
100/200/200: 15 min
(Week 3/Day 1)
Breakfast: 1 homemade Egg McMuffin, coffee w/skim milk
Mid-Morning: 1 mug hot cocoa (made w/skim milk)
Lunch: small serving leftover Garlic Salmon Linguine, 1 chocolate chip cookie
Afternoon: 2 toasted English muffins w/margarine, 2 c. skim milk, 3 chocolate chip cookies. Ugh, nothin' even remotely "moderate" about today!
Supper: 1 serving Baked Ham & Cheese Omelet Roll, 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey, 1 c. skim milk, 1/3 apple, 1/3 large orange
Evening: BAD, BAD, BAD. Today was a BAD day!!!

Wednesday
Breakfast: 1/2 c. skim milk, coffee
Lunch: 1-1/4 c. chicken noodle soup, 8 soda crackers, 1 c. skim milk
Afternoon: 3 more soda crackers
Supper: 6 chicken nuggets w/bbq sauce

Today was a crappy day ~ in more ways than one! :( My 8-yr old was up every 10-20 minutes to use the bathroom from about 4:30am on, and since our bedroom is right next to the bathroom, I didn't get much sleep after that either. Spent the morning at the hospital getting her checked out since this had been going on since Monday. Came home and was basically brain-dead by then. Zombied for the rest of the day.

Thursday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 2 slices toast w/margarine & honey
Mid-morning: 1 mug skim milk hot cocoa
Lunch: 1-1/2 c. Creamy Wild Rice Soup, 2 soda crackers
Supper: 1 serving Tomato-Herbed Pork Chops, 1 small serving onion rice, handful raw baby carrots
Evening: 1 large whole wheat tortilla w/peanut butter & honey, 1 c. skim milk
100/200/200: 17 min
(Week 3/day 2. This is definitely getting challenging!)

Friday
Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey, coffee w/skim milk, 1/2 c. apple juice
Lunch: Chicken Fajita Caesar Salad, garlic breadsticks w/dill dipping sauce, large ice tea (took my poor 8-yr old out for lunch after running errands because she's STILL not back to school and missed a rather special event this morning. Feeling fine, acting fine, but still needing a few too many sudden bathroom breaks to really make school possible.)
Afternoon: 1/3 slice of toast w/peanut butter & honey (leftover from Fidget's breakfast!)
Supper: 1 moderate serving Italian Sauced Chicken over Pasta, 1 large helping cucumber salad, 1 c. skim milk, 4 TimBits

Saturday
Breakfast: 2 pancakes w/margarine & syrup, 1 c. skim milk, coffee
3 miles: 55 min
(walked)
Lunch: 1/2 leftover pancake w/syrup, 1/2 c. apple juice
Afternoon: 4 heaping tablespoons cottage cheese, handful apple and orange slices, few Cinnamon Toast Crunch pieces leftover from one kid's snack
Supper: 1 hamburger, 1 small helping fries, 1 c. leftover cucumber salad, 1 tall glass ice tea
Evening: 1 mug tea w/honey

Sunday
Breakfast: 1/2 serving Baked Ham & Cheese Omelet Roll, 1 slice toast w/margarine & jam, 1/2 c. apple juice, 1/2 c. skim milk
Lunch: 1 serving Italian Sauced Chicken over Pasta, 1 c. ice tea
2 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Supper: 1 chicken & cheese quesadilla (made w/one large whole wheat tortilla), guacamole, salsa, fat-free sour cream, refried beans, large handful nacho chips, 1 can Coke, 1-1/2 c. ice tea

Monday
Breakfast: 1 slice of toast w/honey, 1 c. skim milk, coffee
3 miles: 60 min
(walked)
Lunch: 1 leftover hamburger, a few fries, large handful nacho chips, 1/2 c. ice tea
Afternoon "tea" with the girls: 1/2 c. skim milk, 1 Valetine's mini-cupcake (with just as much icing as cake!), 1 hard candy (while I was making supper)
Supper: 1 serving Hamburger Noodle Stroganoff, generous serving cooked peas & carrots
Evening: 1 mug tea w/honey

This week was rough. Even today, my daughter is still not fully herself (though I sent her back to school yesterday and there's been a drastic improvement over the number of required bathroom breaks ~Praise God!) and I have to confess, the worry has been a huge problem for me. Unfortunately, I think I've passed along to her my talent for almost literally worrying myself sick and over the weekend, hubby and I started to wonder if the reasons her recovery was taking so long were largely anxiety-related. Which makes me feel even worse....

Anyway, a VERY stressful week ~ one I'm hoping to never repeat. I'm hoping for a significantly better week next week! (although it would be tough to beat this week as far as evening snacking is concerned ~ woo-hoo!!)

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 2 min (avg: 26 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2010-02-03T05:33:00.003-06:00

Up another pound. I just can't seem to get my head in the game.

Actually, I think I would have done well if I hadn't had a feeling-sorry-for-myself-because-my-hubby-had-to-leave-for-the-week-again chocolate chip cookie binge the night before weigh-in. Tuesday to Saturday was really good, but Saturday night to Monday night were NOT. I'm pretty sure my stomach groaned a few times in there, but no growling!

Only one successful liquids/fasting day, but TWICE as much exercise as my goal for the week (only because hubby was still home longer than we expected and didn't leave until Monday night, making it possible for me to walk every day. But hey, I'll take it!), and mastery of Week 2 of the 100 Pushups, 200 SitUps, and 200 Squats challenges. I ''girlified" the pushups because my lower back was complaining ~ hubby says I'm obviously doing them wrong (and I'm not arguing), but if I continue to do them the manly way, I'm far more likely to just give up.

My plan for this last week was:

remember to make sure my stomach growls at least twice a day ~~llll~~ lll
complete week 2 of the 100/200/200 challenge done
two successful fasting/liquids days l
at least 3 walks or 30-minute workouts ~~llll~~ l (all walks ~ no surprise there, really!)

So with those goals, I'm fairly satisfied with how I did, but I'm still having a lot of trouble controlling my snack cravings. There seems to be no happy medium ~ if I allow ANYTHING, I binge till I feel sick.

Thanks, by the way, for all the Skinny Cow recommendations last week, but I really don't care for ice cream! (I know, call me crazy.) I prefer salty/savory snacks, so I guess I might need to start buying the 100 calorie chips bags. Not only are they salty instead of sweet, but because they don't melt, I can make each snack last longer! (theoretically...)

Dang it, I wanted to avoid paying extra for pre-portioned snacks, but it looks like I don't have the will-power right now to do it any other way. So I'll add those to my grocery list and other than that, I think I'll continue working on the same goals as last week ~ except week THREE of the 100/200/200 challenge, of course!

Tracking (and reporting) again. ::sigh::

2010-02-02T05:37:00.001-06:00

Tuesday (half day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, coffee
Lunch: 1 c. leftover rice, 1 bite of Fidget's leftover pizza ('cuz that's all she left!), 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: 1 serving Garden Chicken & Stuffing Casserole, 1 large serving cooked mixed veggies
Evening: 2 medium stalks of celery w/peanut butter, 1 mug tea w/honey

Wednesday (liquids)

100/200/200: 15 min
(week 2/day 1)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, coffee, 1 slice toast w/margarine (half w/Nutella, too)
2 miles: 35 min
(walked)
Lunch: 1 mug skinny fake cappuccino (1/2 coffee, 1/2 skim milk, 3 tsp. chocolate milk powder)
Afternoon: 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 mug unsweetened green tea
Supper: 1 serving Shepherd's Pie, large serving cucumber salad

Thursday (normal)
Breakfast: small bowl porridge w/heaping Tbsp. brown sugar and a bit of skim milk, 1/2 c. apple juice, coffee
2 miles: 35 min
(DANG, it's cold out there! Minus 35C/-31F with the windchill!!)
Late Morning: 1 mug green tea w/a bit of honey
Lunch: 3 small pieces leftover pizza, 1/2 large orange
Afternoon: 1 chocolate chip cookie, 1/2 c. skim milk, 1 mug tea w/a bit of honey, handful snacking crackers and 2 slices cheddar
Supper: 2 servings Garlic Salmon Linguine, large serving tossed salad w/lite dressing, 1-1/2 c. ice tea

Friday (liquids)
100/200/200: 15 min
(week 2/day 2)
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1-1/2 c. apple juice
Late Morning: 1 mug green tea w/honey
Lunch: 1-1/4 c. hot V8
Afternoon: 1 mug hot cocoa (made w/skim milk)
2 miles: 35 min
(overdressed; definitely sweated off some water weight today!)
Supper Prep: 3 slices of cheddar
Supper: 1 c. Creamy Wild Rice Soup, 2 Cheddar, Chive & Garlic drop biscuits, 1-1/2 c. ice tea
Evening Snack (we were invited over to friends' for the evening): 4 small handfuls of tortilla chips w/warm queso dip, grapes, 2 mugs coffee w/sweetened, flavoured creamer

Saturday (normal)
Early Morning: coffee w/skim milk
Brunch (which lasted all morning): 2 homemade Egg McMuffins, 1-1/2 c. skim milk, 2 chocolate chip cookies
2 miles: 40 min
(took it easy today)
Afternoon: 1 can Coke, 2 large handful snacking crackers
Supper: large piece of farmer sausage, 5 cheddar & potato perogies w/fat-free sour cream, cooked carrots w/margarine & parsley
Evening: 1 can Coke, WAY too many nacho chips w/salsa, 3 small Toblerone triangles

Sunday (half)
100/200/200: 15 min
(week 2/day 3)
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, half slice toast w/Nutella, 1/2 c. skim milk
Lunch: Friends took us out for all-you-can-eat lunch buffet... 'Nuff said.
4 miles: 70 min
(walked; specifically UNDERdressed to burn more calories!!)
Supper: 2 leftover Cheddar, Chive & Garlic biscuits, 1/2 c. Creamy Wild Rice Soup, 1 serving leftover Garden Chicken & Stuffing Casserole

Today was NOT a "half" day, that's for sure!

Monday (liquids)
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 2 fried eggs, 2 slices cheddar, 2 slices toast w/margarine & honey, 1/2 c. skim milk. Oof, liquids day is off to a rough start! (But I excused it with the fact that it was hubby's last meal at home until Friday supper at the earliest ~ and he wanted to make breakfast!)
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8, 1/2 c. skim milk

2 miles: 35 min

(walked)
Afternoon: 2 mugs green tea w/honey, 1 apple, 1 slice leftover cheese toast from lunch

Supper: small chunk farmer sausage, 1 large serving Macaroni & Cheese Deluxe

Evening (MELTDOWN ALERT): 1/2 bag lite microwave popcorn, EIGHT chocolate chip cookies, 2 c. skim milk

Man, I was doing so well until Saturday night! Been kinda downhill ever since... Hubby is FINALLY back to work; he left Monday night. The first night he's gone is always a rough one for me, eating-wise. Just my luck it was the night before weigh-in!

Total Exercise Time: 4 hrs, 55 min (avg: 42 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2010-01-27T07:00:00.003-06:00

No surprises today. I'm up 1.2.

The possibilities of me reaching my goal for this challenge are getting slimmer and slimmer. (unlike myself...) I KNOW what I need to do, but I have been too weak-willed to force myself to do it lately.

This was my plan for this last week:

no desserts, under ANY circumstances ~ FAIL. Had one or two handfuls of hubby's homemade chocolate chip cookies at least three days. Had dessert after supper the night we were invited out to friends.'
fruit/veggie snacks ONLY ~ yeah, right. FAIL!
two successful fasting days ~ I barely managed to fast between meals. FAIL.
at least three 2-mile walks and three days doing the 100pushup/200situp/200squat challenge (details at the bottom of the sidebar) ~ only one day of situps/pushups/squats, but I did get in 4 walks because hubby's still not working. PASS... barely!

See? The gain isn't a surprise. I guess I need to get back to keeping track of everything I eat and reporting it here. Since that didn't seem to be making a huge difference in the weight LOSS department, I quit, but at least it was helping me not gain!

My plan for this week:

remember to make sure my stomach growls at least twice a day
complete week 2 of the 100/200/200 challenge
two successful fasting days
at least 3 walks or 30-minute workouts

Struggling.

2010-01-23T08:44:00.007-06:00

I'm having a problem this week:

I don't care.
That is the problem; it's also how I FEEL about the problem.

I know motivation is a decision, not an emotion.
I know I overate yesterday.
I know I'm not getting nearly enough calorie-burning exercise in every week.
I know in order to report a loss (or even just maintenance at this point!), I probably need two good fasting days yet before weigh-in.
I KNOW these things....

But I just. don't. care.

HELP!!!!!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2010-01-20T07:25:00.006-06:00

I'm happy with the direction, but not so much the progress.

I'm down, but only 0.8 ~ a little off the 2.2 goal I set for myself last week...

I was did pretty well at mealtimes this week and got in a two-mile walk an amazing 6 out of 7 days, but I know there were more desserts than necessary. And not enough stomach-growling. I curbed snacking relatively well, too, but hubby was home all week, so the fasting efforts were completely abandoned. (his presence at home also explains the availability of desserts!)

I MUST kick it up a notch! (or three) I'm still 5.2 lbs away from my challenge goal, but that's still very doable as long as I take it very seriously.

So the plans for for this week is:

no desserts, under ANY circumstances
fruit/veggie snacks ONLY
two successful fasting days
at least three 2-mile walks and three days doing the 100pushup/200situp/200squat challenge (details at the bottom of the sidebar)

I need a big loss this next week because after that will the "the week of the arrival of that time of the month," and we all know how THAT works for weight loss.

Let's Do This!!

2010-01-14T07:33:00.004-06:00

Wow!! It's been a LONG time since I've peeked in around here.

There's a reason for that.

I have this thing about authenticity. I don't ever want to portray something on this blog (or my personal one, for that matter) that isn't a true representation of me.

I found myself, for whatever reason, longing to lose weight... accepting every "challenge" known to man, but never really CHANGING anything. Sure, I'd lose a few pounds here and there, but ultimately end up gaining them all back (and then some!), and giving up.

Well, a lot has been taking place in my life over the last few months, and I now find myself in a season of peace, healing, and restoration. What better time to GET healthy and STAY that way?

So, I'm back. Not just back, but REALLY back. You know how I know??? Because there's more than just the desire to lose now, there's MOTIVATION and DETERMINATION.

I CAN DO THIS. I WILL DO THIS. I AM DOING THIS!!!

I started a new program (advised by my brother, the nutrition geek!) on January 1, and I am already DOWN 7 pounds!!!

There's nothing like a little success to further motivate, right??

But I'm not just bragging on myself, here. I am bragging on the God who loves me. He loves me enough to let me get to a place where I have to realize that I can no longer do things on my own. Nor was I ever meant to. He loves me enough to let me fall flat on my face and wallow around in the muck and mire of my own self pity until I have had enough! And then, when I cry out for mercy, He loves me enough to extend His hand, lift me up, and set my feet upon His firm foundation.

I keep going back to Beth Moore's "Believing God".

God is who He says He is.
God will do what He says He will do.
I am who God says I am.
I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
His word is ALIVE and ACTIVE in me!
I'm BELIEVING GOD!!

What am I believing God for? Well, definitely for strength and healing, coming out of a tough time, but also for MIGHTY MIRACLES. You see, He' s not done with me yet. He hasn't given up on me and never will.

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~ Ephesians 2:10

For I, the Lord your God, hold your right hand; it is I who say to you, "Fear not, I am the one who helps you". ~ Isaiah 41:13

I am believing that He's got me. That nothing happens that is outside of his control. That I am his. That He loves me. That he has created me for His glory, and wants me to shine for Him. He has things for me to do... things for which I need to be healthy... mind, BODY, and soul.

So, enough with the excuses.

Here I am, Lord! Let's do this!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2010-01-13T05:34:00.002-06:00

Down 2.0 lbs ~ woo-hoo!!
All right, well, I must have done something right for a change. Oh no, wait... it's just Christmas weight coming off because I'm back to more normal eating habits.

Who cares? It's TWO POUNDS! I'm a hair over 2 pounds away from my lowest pre-Christmas weight, so that's good. The plan is to be there next week. And I think I can do it.

This past week, I had an only one excessive evening snack. Two other evenings I ate something after supper; once it was an orange, and once it was two stalks of celery with some peanut butter.

Though I only had two 40-minute, two-mile walks for exercise, my stomach growled before lunch and supper every single day (except Sunday at supper), and I had a successful fasting day on Monday.

I plan for a repeat of last week with some improvements in the exercise and snacking ~ and possibly fasting ~ areas.

Two-point-two is MINE next week!!

Rethinking my shrink.

2010-01-08T15:15:00.002-06:00

Why is rethinking my shrinking strategies a CONSTANT necessity?! I hate that! You discover a plan that works GREAT, but suddenly, without warning or cause, it doesn't anymore! Very annoying.

I achieved great success following the eating plan from the "Becoming a Woman of Moderation" Bible study that kicked off this blog. I followed the plan faithfully for the entire 8-week study, and by the time it ended at the beginning of June, I'd lost just over 16 lbs. I've continued to lose fairly steadily since then, but at a SIGNIFICANTLY slower pace. And why is my pace slower? Because I abandoned the plan once summer was in full swing and just never went back to it.

I meant to once school started again in September, but somehow, it seemed harder than it had in spring. And I just couldn't get myself to NOT eat. Why is motivation so dang fickle?!

I guess because we're under the impressiong that it's a feeling. Everyone knows emotions are fleeting and constantly changing ~ especially women's emotions! Waiting to FEEL motivated is often the fatal flaw in weight-loss strategies or any other goal-setting exercise. If we base motivation on feelings, it will always only be temporary ~ and often won't be there at all, if you're anything like me!!

Motivation must be a decision. If we base motivation on knowledge, and decide to persevere regardless of how we feel, that's when we'll continually experience success.

So here I sit, starting off yet another year heavier than I'd like to be, and setting some goals for myself. I've got the weight goals in place, but HOW TO GET THERE is a bit trickier!!

I don't remember where I wrote it ~ whether here on the blog or in an email to someone ~ but one of my babysteps is that I want to feel hungry at least twice a day. Before I eat lunch and supper, I want my stomach to have been growling so I'll know I actually need to eat. So far since we got home from Christmas-ing in The Big City, I've succeeded with this.

I also need to eliminate routine evening snacking. Emphasis on the "ROUTINE." This doesn't mean that I won't allow myself to EVER eat in the evenings, but normal evenings at home should NOT be spent eating! This might mean virtually eliminating TV from my habits as well, since I can't seem to watch TV without eating.

Also, I need to improve my water consumption. This is a strange thing for me to have to specifically make a goal because for most of my adult life, I've easily consumed 1-2 litres/quarts per day in addition to what I drink at mealtimes. I've noticed over the last several months though, that I've been brewing bigger and bigger pots of coffee in the morning and that I sooner pour myself a cup several times throughout the day than drink water. I need to get back to just two cups of coffee in the morning and then water for the rest of the day.

Exercise remains a challenge and I haven't quite decided what I want to do about it. I SAY I want to do my Fat-Burning Pilates video (the only cardio workout video I own) on days when I can't or don't walk outdoors, but I have yet to actually DO that. I just don't like exercising!! I LOVE walking and jogging, but that obviously has to do more with enjoying the solititude and being outside (even at -40!) than with exercise. Does anyone have any suggestions for short cardio workouts, like 10-15 minutes in length?

Since beginning this post, I've checked out the 10-Minute Solutions series and they look interesting. Shorter workouts are MUCH more appealing and far more likely to happen!! I think a couple of these will be my reward for successfully meeting my 8-pound goal for this current Sisterhood challenge.

Okay, I think that's enough babysteps for this challenge!! Any more and I'll give up before I even start trying!

Thursday Three ~ Small Victories

2010-01-07T09:05:00.004-06:00

Yesterday, my stomach was growling fiercely before lunch.

And again by the time afternoon "tea" rolled around.

And I had a hard time ignoring it and trying to fall asleep at night, too.

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2010-01-06T06:03:00.001-06:00

All right, here we go!

New year, new decade, new opportunities...

...same old self-control issues!

Dang it.

Not surprisingly, I gained some weight over Christmas holidays. From my last reported weigh-in three weeks ago, I'm up three pounds. From my lowest weight ever (December 9/09), I'm up 4.2 lbs. Not insurmountable.

I intend to have those pounds PLUS two more gone by the end of the month. My goal for the end of this challenge is a total of eight, which will bring me to 151.

It will mean hard work. It will mean eliminating routine daily snacking. It will mean sweatin' to the only cardio work-out DVD I have on days when I can't walk outdoors. It will mean no second helpings ~ EVER. It will mean no more routine suppertime desserts. In short, it will require a LOT of self-discipline. Something I seem to practise only periodically.

But I'm determined. I've been pretty slack for the last six months ~ my cumulative weight loss for July through December is a measely 2.8 pounds, thanks for the most part, to Christmas ~ and it's time to re-engage myself. I've only been this close to my goal weight once before in my married life and this time I intend to go all the way. My plan is to hit 140 by the end of May.

THIS. IS. MY. YEAR.

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2009-12-16T07:14:00.005-06:00

Ugh.

Once again, hubby's 4-day "visit" persuaded me to completely throw out all semblance of order and MODERATION. Well, actually, I think until last night, I would have done okay at maintaining, even though I didn't write anything down.

But last night was pure binging ugliness.

The night before weigh-in is always my biggest struggle and add to that the emotional eating that almost always happens the first night hubby's gone, and you've got a disaster of epic proportions.

So it stands to reason that I'm finishing off this challenge with a GAIN of 1.2 pounds. Blecgh.

I'm finding after the busy week I had ending Sunday night, that I'm just drained. I've got no energy, no focus, and I just don't care about anything! Which, of course, includes attempting to eat in moderation.

I think part of my problem is a spiritual problem. Again. After spending a few months in turmoil and struggling with conviction, now that I've found out why all that was happening and what the point was, I feel myself coasting again and not spending the same kind of time in the Word and in prayer as I did before. I'm not hungry for it anymore, which saddens me. Last week, I chalked it up to being insanely busy and having a bajillion things to do each day to keep the house running while I organized the church Christmas program, but this week it's just pure laziness.

So I think my goal for the next several weeks is not specifically quantitative, but rather qualitative ~ I want to feel my stomach rumbling before at least one meal each day (preferably two) and I want to dig back into my quiet time with God.

I want BOTH kinds of hunger back!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2009-12-09T07:29:00.004-06:00

Randomness again.

I just don't get it.

I just don't understand how, after the horrible eating and exercise week I've just had, and knowing TOM should be arriving this weekend....

I just don't get how I'm down a pound.

But I'll take it!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-12-08T05:00:00.000-06:00

Tuesday (half)

Lazy; didn't record. Safe to say it wasn't treated like a half day...

Wednesday (liquid)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Shovelled the walk: 10 min

(I'm not a fan of winter, but I actually quite like this built-in outdoor exercise that comes with it, especially on days when I can't leave the house to go for a walk. And when I'm desperate, we've got a 75-ft driveway I can shovel, too!!)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: 1 mug ginger peach tea w/tsp. honey, handful assorted snacking crackers

Supper: 1 serving Scalloped Potatoes & Ham, 1 large serving cucumber salad, 1 c. ice tea

Evening: 1 large bowl Honey-Nut Cheerios w/skim milk, 2 slices FRESH-FROM-THE-MACHINE bread w/margarine and 4 slices of cheddar, small bowl barbecue chips.

Ugh. And I started out SO WELL! Nuts.

Thursday (normal)

Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1/2. skim milk, 1 slice toast w/Nutella

2 miles: 35 min

(Walked. It was -15C/5F this morning, so I had to break out the ski pants and winter boots. Probably won't be jogging anymore till spring...)

Shovelled the walk: 10 min

Late morning: 2 large handfuls salted, mixed nuts; 2 mugs mint green tea (one w/honey)

Lunch: a bit too large a serving of leftover Scalloped Potatoes & Ham from last night, 1 large glass ice tea

Supper: 1 c. Main Course Soup, 1 cheese toast, 1 slice cheddar (as I was preparing the cheese toasts!)

Evening: 3 servings chips, 1 can Coke

Dang it, I've got laundry to fold! Why wasn't I doing THAT??!!

Friday (normal ~ switched with Saturday; and yes, this means I broke the rule about not having the same type of days back-to-back!!)

Breakfast: 1/3 c. oatmeal, cooked, w/a bit of skim milk and a heaping Tbsp. brown sugar, coffee w/skim milk

Lunch (and a friend over to plan church Christmas program): 1 c. Main Course Soup, 1 Cheese, Chive & Garlic biscuit, 1 c. V8 Splash

Supper: 1 can Coke, 1 hotdog w/chicken weiner and a slice of processed cheese, small helping of baked fries

Evening: 1 can Coke

Stayed away from the TV and avoided snacking this evening ~ woo-hoo!!

Saturday (fasting/liquids ~ traded w/Friday)

Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk

Lunch: 1 c. V8 Splash

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/tsp honey each

Before Supper: 2 handfuls mixed nuts, 3 slices cheddar

Supper: 1 serving Broccoli Cheddar Quiche, 3-1/2 Mom's Pantry Croissants w/margarine, 2 c. V8 Splash

Ugh. Again, I was doing SO well until I allowed myself one handful of nuts and a slice of cheese while making supper. See, but I could have compensated for the supper-making snack and given myself only an eighth of the quiche instead of a sixth. And I certainly could have stopped at just ONE croissant.... but I didn't.

I was so full, I wasn't even TEMPTED to snack later in the evening.

Sunday (half)

Breakfast: half slice of toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk, most in my coffee
Lunch: 1 hotdog, a few fries
Afternoon: 4 freshly-baked Sugar Cookies, 1 c. skim milk
Supper: 1/2 c. Chicken Noodle Soup, 1 Garlic Cheddar & Chive biscuit
Evening (had a friend come over after we'd both put our kids to bed ~ relax, her husband was at home!!): 1 serving Pear Crisp w/scoop of vanilla ice cream

Monday (liquids)
Breakfast: coffee, coffee, and more coffee w/skim milk (stayed up a little too late last night and can't even blame the friend.)
Late lunch: 1 c. V8 (Cold. Man, did I have to gulp it fast in order to choke it down!), sliver of Cheddar Broccoli Quiche
Supper: small serving Cheesy Chicken Rice Casserole, 2 servings raw veggies w/a bit of low-fat salad dressing for dipping
Evening: 1/3 bag butter-flavoured, lite microwave popcorn, large handful snacking crackers

NOT a good liquids day. Too bad it wasn't a "half" day ~ I think it would have been excellent!! All in all, a less than stellar week.

Again.

Total exercise time: 55 min (avg: 8 min/day) Yikes.
Average Exercise Level: Moderate
Total distance travelled: 3 mi/4.8 km

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ tammi

2009-12-02T06:42:00.004-06:00

Maintenance week. ::sigh::

I have not kept track of my food intake since Friday morning and I have not followed the eating plan. There has been snacking, over-eating, eating full meals when I should have been eating half meals, and eating ANYHING when I should have been eating nothing. My husband was home from Friday night till last night, and on not ONE of those days did I go for a walk or a run.

And I can't even blame Thanksgiving ~ we got that over with way back in the first half of October.

I have NOT been "walking the talk."

Must give myself the obviously necessary kick in the backside, because I really do want to be under 155 by Christmas. That means only another pound, but it will get increasingly more difficult to achieve as we get closer and closer to the holidays. Not to mention all the celebrations, feasts, and family gatherings that will begin in only THREE weeks!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-12-01T06:51:00.015-06:00

Tuesday (half)
Breakfast: small piece of toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: small serving (probably only 2/3 c.) leftover Hamburger Stroganoff w/veggies & spaghetti, 1 c. ice tea, 1 small piece Fudge Nut Bars

2.75 miles: 45 min

(walked today)

Supper: half-serving leftover Jalapeno Corn Bake, 1/2 c. Salsa Rice, 1 c. cooked broccoli, 1 c. ice tea

Kindergarten Family Gym Night: 60 min

(OH. MY. GOODNESS. Playing kindergarten games LIKE a 5-yr old is a WAY harder workout than jogging!!!)

Evening: 1 pear, 1 mug unsweetened green tea

Pretty excited about how the day went today!!

Wednesday (liquids)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (half of it in my coffee)

Late Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/honey

Before Supper: 2 small Ritz cracker & cheese "sandwiches" ~ leftover from Peanut's lunchbag

Supper: 1 serving leftover Herbed Mashed Potatoes, chunk leftover BBQ Steak (from when the in-laws were out and provided steaks for hubby's birthday supper; probably about 5 ozs) w/prepared horseradish, 1 large helping Cheesy Zucchini (made w/lite cheddar)

Evening: 1 c. skim milk, two large pieces Fudge Nut Bars, 1 mug green tea w/honey

Thursday (normal)

Breakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey, 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: the last small piece of leftover steak and about 1 c. leftover mashed potatoes from last night's supper, 2 small pieces Fudge Nut Bars

hauled a wheelbarrow load of wood into the basement: 10 minutes

(6 trips into the basement with an armload of wood)

2.25 miles: 35 min

(walked again; quads and glutes still rather stiff from Tuesday night!)

Supper: 5 chicken nuggets, handful curly fries, 1 small piece Fudge Nuts Bars (man, I have got to get that stuff off the kitchen counter!!!), 1/3 bag of lite, butter-flavoured microwave popcorn

Friday (normal ~ switched with Saturday)

Breakfast: 2 toasted English muffins w/margarine, 1-1/2 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

Lunch: 2 Pizza Pops, 2 pieces Fudge Nut Bars

cleaned up remaining leaf piles and dismantled trampoline: 70 min

(light to moderate activity)

...and then things REALLY fell apart ~ eating-wise, exercise-wise AND reporting-wise! Hubby came home after being gone since Sunday afternoon and I'll admit, the remaining days this week did NOT follow the eating plan. Not even remotely. Even the man commented on that last night, much to my annoyance!

As of tonight or tomorrow, he'll be gone for 10 days, and that always makes it either easier or harder to stick with the plan. I don't seem to be able to maintain my plan while he's around and yet I never lose control in the evenings if he's home the way I sometimes do when I'm alone. Since I completely disregarded my plan with him home now the last three days, I'm hoping that means it'll be easier while he's gone!

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 40 min (avg: 31 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate
Total distance travelled: approx 13 mi/20.9 km

Weigh-In Wednesday ~ Tammi

2009-11-25T06:28:00.005-06:00

I had a GREAT week!! This is the first week in a LONG time where I'm back at the point again where I actually kind of LIKE having a growling stomach. You know why?

Because it means I'm in control!! It means I'm not just impulsively stuffing my mouth, I'm not eating because I'm bored, lonely, depressed, or celebrating; I'm choosing to eat only when I'm actually hungry! (haha, now watch me TOTALLY mess up next week, now that I've said that!)

And I'm so pleased to be able to report that I'm right back where I was two weeks ago. That's right, after having to report a gain of 3.6# last week (eeek), I can report a LOSS OF 3.6 today!!!! Woo-hoo!!!

I'm sure I lost most of it last night. Man, I tell ya, if you want a workout ~ and I mean a workout like you've never had before if all you do is running, spinning, and the odd aerobics class as a rule ~ grab the nearest 5-yr old, follow them to school, and run around in the gym with them for an hour, playing their games the way THEY play them!!! Oh. My. Goodness. I almost DIED last night at my youngest's "family gym night" event!!

Two years ago, when my oldest was in kindergarten, I managed to LOOK like I was participating without actually doing much. This year, I determined I'd get right in there. (mostly because hubby wasn't along this time, and I couldn't rely on his enthusiasm for play to overshadow my laziness!) Due to the running I've been doing over the last few months, I could easily have handled playing the various games of tag for the full hour. No problems there. I wasn't even breathing as hard as many of the kids! (woo-hoo! SCORE for me!)

BUT....

Towards the end of the hour, we played this stop-start-crawllikecrazy-then-get-up-and-run-again relay race-type game that seriously almost made me pass out. I felt very green for a few minutes and had to sit down against the cold concrete wall. That was some incredibly intense interval training!

But what a great feeling to survive it!! When we got home, the girls had a piece of dessert before bed because they claimed they were both starving, and while I was very tempted to have one as well (and I'd TOTALLY earned it!), I waited until they were in bed and then I had a pear. That's it! Just a pear. And some unsweeted green tea.

I haven't felt that satisfied with the choices I've made in a very long time.

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-11-24T08:15:00.000-06:00

Tuesday (normal ~ switched with Thursday)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk (some in the coffee), 1 slice toast w/Nutella
Lunch: 3 cornmeal muffins w/margarine & honey
Afternoon: 1 mini Banana Chip Muffin

raking: 60 min

Supper: 1- 1/2 c. Lemon Chicken & Rice Soup, 2 slices cheddar, 1 slice toast w/margarine
Evening: 2 regular-sized Banana Chip Muffins w/margarine

Wednesday (liquids)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 1.5 miles in three half-mile intervals)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8, 1 c. V8 Splash

Raking: 30 min

(had more to do, but my arms just couldn't take any more!)

Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/skim milk & honey
Supper: 1 slice cheddar, 1 burrito (approx 1/3 c. mixed taco beef, cooked rice, guacamole and a slice of cheddar wrapped in a 10" tortilla ~ great way to clean up leftover odds and ends!!), 1 stalk celery dipped in Caesar dressing
Evening: unsweetened green mint tea, 1 stalk of celery w/peanut butter

Thursday (half ~ switched with Tuesday)

Breakfast: 1 small toast crust w/Nutella, 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee)

Lunch: 1 c. Kraft Dinner, 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 orange

Pick Your Spot Pilates: 30 min

(did all three 10-minute workouts ~ belly, butt, and thighs)

Afternoon: 1 large mug of hot chocolate, 1 soda cracker, 2 ripple chips while I made supper... but only TWO!!!!

Supper: 1 very small serving Old-Fashioned Tuna Potato Chip Casserole, small helping ginger glazed carrots.

Evening: leftover hot chocolate (about 1/2 c.), 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 cereal bowl Ripple chips, 1 Banana Chocolate Chip Muffin w/margarine

Except for the evening, this was another solid day. And the evening wasn't bad, really, either. If I hadn't stayed up so stinkin' late, my stomach would never have started to growl. But at least I waited for that before I started snacking ~ that's a victory in and of itself!

Friday (fasting/liquids)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most of it in my coffee)

2.25 miles: 30 min

(jogged and walked the usual 4 intervals)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8, 1/2 c. V8 Splash

Late Afternoon: 1 mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey, 1 mini-Banana Chip Muffin (basically one large bite)

Supper: 1 KFC Spicy Big Crunch Sandwich, small fries, 1/2 large Pepsi

Evening: 1/3 bag low-fat microwave popcorn, large cereal bowl of Ripple Chips

Saturday (normal)

Brunch: coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, 2 fried eggs, 1 serving homemade hashbrowns, 1 small chunk steak, 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey

Afternoon: 1 c. iced tea

LATE Supper (9:30pm!): 1 c. ice tea, 1 burrito (leftover venison steak, rice, refried beans, onions & cheddar in a 10" tortilla) dipped in salsa and fat-free sour cream, 1 peanut butter & Nutella tortilla roll-up, 2 c. skim milk, handful jellybeans

Sunday (half)

Breakfast: 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1/2 c. V8 Splash, coffee w/skim milk

Lunch: 1/2 c. Multi-Bean Soup, 1/2 slice toast w/margarine, 1 c. ice tea

Afternoon: 2 mugs coffee w/skim milk

Supper: 1 cereal bowl Kraft Dinner

Pick Your Spot Pilates: 30 min

(all 3 workouts again)

Monday (liquids)

Fat-Burning Pilates: 40 min

(Yikes. Much harder than jogging!)

Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (most in my coffee)

Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

Afternoon: had a few licks of cake batter to make sure I made it right! (I've learned the hard way how important it is to ALWAYS taste before baking!!)

Supper: 1 serving Hamburger Stroganoff (made w/fat-free sour cream) and spaghetti w/peas and carrots mixed in

Evening: finger foods ~ 1 small piece of dessert, 3 pieces veggie pizza, handful grapes, a handful of little whole wheat crackers w/cheese and pickles, 1/2 c. punch, coffee w/cream

Total exercise time: 4 hrs, 10 mins (avg: 36 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to Heavy
Total distance travelled: 12 mi/19.3 km (converting Pilates workouts and raking into miles adds approximately another 7.5 miles/12.1 kms to the physical distance travelled the days actually I went for a walk or jog.)

Weigh-In Wednesday ~ Tammi

2009-11-18T05:23:00.000-06:00

Ugh. I made some SERIOUS REVERSE progress this week. I'm

THREE. POINT. SIX.

POUNDS!!!!!

I'm so unimpressed with myself. Every now and again, I have a month where the week before "TOM" arrives, I'm just completely out of control. There's literally this sense of desperation to cram every last morsel in the house down my gullet. This month was by far my worst experience with it.

So that, combined with having company from Friday afternoon to Monday afternoon, which makes drinking juice instead of eating make me look like a questionable hostess....

Not good. VERY BAD, in fact.

This week's goals: no evening snacking, more prayer and inspirational reading when the munchies attack, and following my own advice!!!!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-11-17T09:56:00.002-06:00

Wow, y'all just have NO IDEA how badly I'd like to just pretend this week didn't happen!!

Tuesday (half day)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk (some in the coffee), 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella

2.25 miles: 45 min

(walked)

Lunch: 1/2 c. Lemon Chicken & Rice Soup, 1/2 ham sandwich w/half a slice of processed cheese, mustard & margarine
Afternoon: two handfuls assorted jelly beans, candy corn, etc.
Supper: nacho chips and homemade guacamole
Evening: more nacho chips w/guacamole. And some halloween chocolates. And then some more. And then some toasted pumpkin seeds. And then another chocolate. And another...

Ugh. Today. I. was. HORRIBLE!!!!!! Fortunately, weigh-in was first thing in the morning before the madness began. But still. Even if tomorrow wasn't a liquids day, I'd be tempted to punish myself by enforcing a fast.

Wednesday (liquids day)
Morning: coffee w/skim milk

2.25 miles: 35 min
(jogged and walked half-mile intervals)

Afternoon: 1-1/2 c. unsweetened apple juice, large mug ginger peach tea w/honey, 1 mug Chai tea w/skim milk & honey
Supper: 1 c. Multi-bean soup, 2 cheddar drop biscuits w/margarine, 1 c. iced tea
Evening: Blew it again. Halloween chocolates, 1 can Coke, and crackers w/swiss and cheddar cheese. This always happens when hubby has to leave for the night. I am so unimpressed with myself.

Thursday (normal)

2.25 miles: 40 min
(walked)

Breakfast: 1 Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffin w/margarine, 1/2 c. skim milk (all in my coffee ~ I had lots of coffee this morning!)
Early Lunch: 1 mug hot chocolate milk, 2 leftover garlic cheese biscuits from last night's supper
Afternoon: 1 serving Spaghetti w/Tuna & Lemon, 1 garlic cheese biscuit, 1 c. apple juice
Supper: 1 serving Shepherd's Pie, 1 serving Taco Chip Salad (lettuce, tomatoes, shredded cheddar, crushed nacho chips, dressing: half and half lite Miracle Whip and Calorie-Wise Sundried Tomato & Oregano dressing)
Evening: Wow, I'm not even going to detail what I ate. Suffice it to say, it was a binge of epic proportions.

I'm expecting "that time of the month" this weekend and every now and again, I've discovered this makes me eat uncontrollably. I seriously feel like I MUST stuff myself. It doesn't happen every month, but I've definitely noticed a bit of a pattern.

Friday (fasting)
HA.
Breakfast: 1 small bowl Corn Flakes w/a skim milk and a bit of brown sugar, 1 c. apple juice, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 peanut butter & Nutella tortilla roll-up sandwich, 1 c. skim milk
Supper: 1 serving ham fried rice, 1 large serving Japanese coleslaw, 2 egg rolls w/plum sauce, 2 c. iced tea, 1 halloween chocolate

Saturday (normal)
Brunch: 1 Brunch Enchilada, 1 large cornmeal muffin, coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 serving EACH orange and apple slices
Snack: 1 cinnamon roll, 2 slices cheddar, 1/2 c. skim milk

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 3/4 in four intervals)

Supper: 1/2 large barbecued pork chop, 1 large serving Herbed Mashed Potatoes, 1 large serving cooked carrots w/honey & ginger, 2 c. iced tea, 1 serving Gingerbread Cake w/Caramel Cream frosting, 1 c. skim milk

Sunday (half)
Breakfast: 1 bowl Corn Flakes w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 small slice bread w/margarine, 3 slices cheddar, 6 soda crackers, 1 c. Lemon Chicken Soup, handful mini chocolate bars

2.25 miles: 40 min
(walked)

Supper: 1 large serving Cordon Bleu Casserole Supreme, 1 serving steamed broccoli, 1 c. iced tea

Evening: chocolate covered almonds, 1 can pop

Monday (liquids)
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash
Lunch: 1 Brunch Enchilada, pickles, 1/2 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 slice toast w/margarine & jam, 1 c. iced tea
Afternoon: 1 mug tea w/honey

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jogged 3/4 in four intervals)

Supper: 1 c. hot V8 w/swiss cheese, soda crackers, and a slice of rye bread w/margarine, 1/2 c. V8 Splash
Evening: Well, let's just say, "par for the course."

Wow. I think the scale is going to run and hide when it sees me come into the bathroom tomorrow morning... This was NOT a good week.

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 40 min (avg: 31 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to difficult
Total distance travelled: 13.5 mi/21.7 km

When you don't feel like it...

2009-11-12T06:56:00.009-06:00

Take heart.

I've a confession to make. My last two evenings have been dismal failures in the self-discipline department. I have binged like you wouldn't believe. I can hardly believe it. While incredibly annoying and frustrating, I find it interesting that these kinds of evenings only seem to happen when I'm actually following a plan of sorts.

For the months in between this current return to the eating plan on the sidebar and the previous one (which ended in the beginning of July), I've rarely had what I'd call an evening binge. Regular evening snacking, yes; but not bingeing. And now, in the last week and a half since returning to the program, I've had at least three.

Isn't that the way it always seems to work? As soon as you make the resolution, the follow-through becomes more of a challenge than it was before?

For believers in Christ, I think this makes perfect sense. When we're coasting along, not being deliberate about our lives, the devil isn't concerned about the effect we'll have on the world around us. It's once we start burning a little brighter that he starts gettin' nervous, throwing up the distractions and the roadblocks.

I found some great wisdom and encouragement on the Desiring God blog this morning and I want to share it with you, too.

Did you wake up not feeling like reading your Bible and praying? How many times today have you had to battle not feeling like doing things you know would be good for you?

While it’s true that this is our indwelling sin that we must repent of and fight against, there’s more going on.

Think about this strange pattern that occurs over and over in just about every area of life:
Good food requires discipline to prepare and eat while junk food tends to be the most tasty, addictive, and convenient.
Keeping the body healthy and strong requires frequent deliberate discomfort while it only takes constant comfort to go to pot.
You have to make yourself pick up that nourishing theological book while watching a movie can feel so inviting.
You frequently have to force yourself to get to devotions and prayer while sleeping, reading the sports, and checking Facebook seems effortless.
To play beautiful music requires thousands of hours of tedious practice.
To excel in sports requires monotonous drills ad nauseum.
It takes years and years of schooling just to make certain opportunities possible.
This goes on and on.

The pattern is this: the greater joys are obtained through struggle and pain, while brief, unsatisfying, and often destructive joys are right at our fingertips. Why is this?

Because, in great mercy, God is showing us everywhere, in things that are just shadows of heavenly things, that there is a great reward for those who struggle through (Hebrews 10:32-35). He is reminding us repeatedly each day to walk by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7). Each struggle is an invitation by God to follow in the footsteps of his Son, “who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2).

Those who are spiritually blind only see futility in these things. But for those who have eyes to see, God has woven hope (faith in future grace) right into the futility of creation (Romans 8:20-21). Each struggle is a pointer saying, “Look! Look to the real Joy set before you!”

So when you don’t feel like doing what you know is best for you, take heart and don’t give in. Your Father is pointing you to the reward he has planned for all who endure to the end (Matthew 24:13).

For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are
unseen are eternal. (1 Corinthians 4:17-18)

Now, if that doesn't help you view your temptations and struggles in a new light, I don't know what will!!!

Weigh-in Wednesday ~ Tammi

2009-11-11T05:03:00.003-06:00

And the downward slide continues! Met my goal again for this week ~ down another 1.2 lbs!!

This means, my friends, that since the very first year I was married (the year I packed on an incredible 40 lbs in just 6 months), this is the lightest I've ever been!!!

Oh, I've been lighter in my adult life, but since getting married and packing on all that weight, and TRYING to lose it year after year after year.... I'm finally getting somewhere!! I'm now exactly 2.2 lbs lighter than I've ever gotten on any previous attempt!! (yesterday, on my liquids day and after my run, it was closer to 4 pounds, but supper changed things a little.)

I'm loving the partnership I have with my bloggy friends Susanne and Jamie and the wonderful encouragement and support these ladies are. Knowing they're whispering prayers for me throughout the day certainly helps in the will-power department!

The return of Tammi's "Walk the Talk Tuesdays"

2009-11-10T05:15:00.022-06:00

Tuesday (half day)
Breakfast: coffee, 1 c. skim milk
Mid-morning: 1/2 slice toast w/margarine

2.25 miles: 30 min

(walked 0.125, jogged 0.5, walked 0.25, jogged 0.5, walked 0.25, jogged 0.5, walked 0.125)

Lunch: 1/2 c. Creamy Wild Rice Soup
Afternoon: 1 large mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey
Supper: 1 small helping Beefy Jalapeno Corn Bake, 1/3 c. Salsa Rice, 1 large helping Cucumber Salad, 1 c. pink lemonade, 1 slice Chocolate Cream Pie (1/8 of a 9" deep dish pie ~ I made way too much on the weekend and now we've got this problem of having to eat it because it doesn't freeze well!) 1 c. skim milk
Evening: 1 individual Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and 1 mini Oh Henry bar

Okay, the "half" day kinda fell apart when we'd finished supper. We really do need to finish the pies (I've got a whole pumpkin pie in the fridge yet, too!) because ain't NO WAY I'm lettin' that Chocolate Cream go bad!!!!!! My stomach was growling later in the evening, so that's how I justified the two small halloween chocolates. I know, I know, I didn't follow the rules. I guarantee you I ate less than I have been, but definitely still more than half. It'll take me a while to get my head back into this, I think.

Wednesday (liquids day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, some of it in the coffee
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8 (w/a few seasonings and spices; eaten like tomato soup), 1 c. V8 splash
Afternoon: 1 large mug green tea w/1 tsp. honey
Supper: 1 serving Sunday Brunch Casserole, 1 slice Chocolate Cream Pie w/whipping cream, 1 c. skim milk (everyone else had just chocolate pie or pumpkin pie, but because I hadn't eaten all day, I wanted something other than just pie. I know, it's a weird meal, but, well, you can read about it here.)

Evening: 1/3 bag low-fat, butter-flavoured microwave popcorn (stomach started grumbling around 8-ish ~ it's amazing how quickly one feels full after not eating all day, but how quickly the hunger returns!)

Thursday ("normal" day)
Breakfast: 1 small-ish slice toast (it was the crust, so it was a bit smaller than a full-size slice) w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk, coffee

2.25 miles: 30 min
(four reps of jogging 3/8-mile, walking 1/8-mile with 1/8-mile warm-up/cool-down walk at each end)

Mid-morning: 1 banana
Lunch: 1 large serving Thanksgiving in a Pan (made with double gravy and a layer of mashed potatoes), 1 c. V8 Splash, 1 small piece Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake w/whipping cream
Afternoon tea: large mug tea w/1 tsp. honey, probably 2 servings of fresh fruit ~ cantaloupe, oranges, and apples.
Supper: small helping One Pot Ham Dinner, 1 large helping tossed salad w/Thousand Island dressing, 1 piece chocolate cream pie w/whipping cream, 1 c. skim milk
Evening: too many nacho chips w/salsa, 8 mini chocolate bars. UGH.

Friday (liquids day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, some of that in my coffee
Lunch: 1 c. hot V8

3.25 miles: 60 min
(walked today)

Afternoon: 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: small serving barbecued chicken, 2 helpings scalloped potatoes, 2 servings cooked corn, raw carrot sticks and tomato slices, TWO slices of bread w/margarine, small helping apple crisp w/vanilla ice cream, coffee w/2% milk

We were invited over to the pastor's home for supper and I was FAMISHED!!!! Despite the large supper I ate, my stomach started howling again around 9:30, shortly after we got home, and I ended up having two handfuls of soda crackers and a glass of skim milk yet before going to bed! Amazingly, my Saturday morning weight was unchanged from my weigh-in weight.

Saturday (normal day)
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk (some in my coffee), 2 pancakes w/margarine and syrup

4.25 miles: 60 min
(jogging and walking in half-mile repetitions, with a 1/8-mi warm-up/cool-down walk at each end)

Aternoon: 1-1/2 servings Sunday Brunch Casserole, 1 c. V8 Splash
Supper: A&W onion rings, Teen Burger, 3/4 large root beer, 5 halloween chocolates, 1 c. skim milk

Ugh. WAY too many of the wrong kinds of rewards today!!

Sunday (half day)
Breakfast: 1/2 piece toast w/margarine & saskatoon jam, LOTS of coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: 1 bowl hot V8, 1 cheese toast, 2 small slices cheese (while I was making lunch), 3 soda crackers, 1/2 c. skim milk, 1 Oreo cookie

3.25 miles: 55 min
(walking)

Supper: 1/2 bun w/margarine, 2 slices cheddar, a bunch of pickles, 1 small bowl of cherry preserves, several chunks of canteloupe
Evening: 1 mug peppermint green tea w/honey

Well, I don't like half days any more than the first time I went through this, but despite my dismal failure at lunch, the other two meals were definitely HALFERS!! I had to go to bed early to keep from eating in the evening.

Monday (liquids day)
Breakfast: coffee and 1 c. skim milk, 1 c. V8 Splash

2.25 miles: 40 min
(jogged a combined total of 1.25 miles in 4 intervals, walked the rest)

Late Lunch: 1-1/2 c. hot V8, 1 c. V8 Splash
Afternoon Tea: 1 mug unsweetened green tea, 3 bite-sized pieces of celery w/peanut butter (fixing the girls an afternoon snack killed me! I didn't have much trouble with stomach rumblies today until our regular snack time after school.)

Supper: 1 large serving Lemon Tuna Spaghetti, 2 servings cucumber slices w/a bit of Creamy Caesar dressing
Evening: 1 stalk celery w/peanut butter, 1 orange, 1 c. skim milk ~ all while hubby sat beside me on the couch eating halloween chocolates!!!!!!!!!!!

Total exercise time: 4 hrs, 35 min (avg: 39 min/day)
Average Exercise Level: Moderate to heavy
Total distance travelled: 17.5 miles/28.16 km

All in all, an okay week. Felt especially good to get back into jogging. We'll see how long the road conditions allow it!

Here We Go!!!

2009-11-09T07:25:00.002-06:00

I'm back!! ;-)

It's been a while since I've posted... too long, actually. I am reporting in today at my HIGHEST weight EVER. Yet, I am not depressed, nor discouraged. I am on a journey... a pilgrimage... and the only way to get there is ONE STEP at a time.

Today I am focusing on the lies that I have believed about myself:

You're not good enough.
You can't do it.
You don't deserve it.
You'll never make it.
Your doomed to be this way.
You're such a disappointment.
You'll always be that girl with "such a pretty face"... but the rest of you will never amount to anything.

Lies! Lies! Lies!!!

He (the devil) was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies. - John 8:44

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. - John 10:10

It's time to look up from my mess... quit focusing on the negative... STOP BELIEVING the lies and cast my eyes upon the hills:

I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

(Psalm 121:1-4)

You know... in a way he's right. The devil, I mean... maybe that's why his lies are so believable.

I can't do this. Not on my own. Not in my own strength. But "with God, all things are possible"... and "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength".

It's a NEW day!!!

Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
(Lamentations 3:22-23)

Thank you JESUS!!! You are my STRENGTH, my SHIELD, my PORTION, my ROCK, my REDEEMER, my DELIVERER, and my FORTRESS... I will not be moved!!

So today, I will believe:

I CAN do this.
I WILL do this.
I AM worthy of success.
God IS who he says he is.
God CAN DO what he says he will do.
I AM who God says I am.
I can do ALL THINGS through Christ who strengthens me.

No longer will I believe the lies of Satan. No longer will his traps ensnare me. My Redeemer comes in power to rescue me... and I am BELIEVING GOD for victory!!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2009-11-04T05:40:00.002-06:00

And a big ol' WOO-HOO, because I met my target for this week!

I'd hoped to be at 157.0 this morning, and I was! Which means I'm down 1.8# from last week.

AND we had company from Friday night to Sunday night, I did NOT really do as well in the eating department as I would have liked, and I think I've only walked ONCE in the last 3 weeks.... It just really doesn't make sense to me.

Is it just me, or does this weight-loss thing appear very RANDOM much of the time? I'm not complaining, of course (not THIS time, anyway!!), but it does often seem to have little rhyme or reason, doesn't it?

Anyhoo... I've decided to re-adopt the eating plan on the sidebar and go through the 8-week Becoming a Woman of Moderation Bible study again with a bloggy friend. It will be a challenge, no doubt ~ and especially since we can't physically meet with each other ~ but with all that the Internet and modern computers have to offer, I'm sure we'll have no problems keeping in touch and keeping each other accountable. Well, no problems keeping in touch, for sure. The accountability thing will undoubtedly be a bit tougher!!

But I look forward to good results. AND to starting off the New Year (which begins exactly 8 weeks from Friday ~ that's right, you heard me!) on a positive note, instead of regretting over-eating and having to make the same ol' resolutions I always have in the past!!

Shrink-a-versary

2009-10-28T10:43:00.003-05:00

Well, I'm not sure which "shrink-a-versary" I'm personally celebrating (seems I've been trying to shrink FOREVER!), but The Sisterhood is celebrating one year in existence next month and hosting not only another weight loss challenge, but daily giveaways for the entire month of November as well!

And it's time I hopped back on top of things. Since early summer, my weight has continued to drop, but not at all significantly. And while I'm impressed that I've been able to maintain a weight that hovers around and just under 160 lbs (as opposed to around or above 190!) without feeling like I'm missing out on anything, it's time to prove that I can accomplish a little bit more yet.

This challenge ends seven weeks from now, on December 16, and I'd like to drop 8.8 lbs during that time, which would bring me to an even 150. And being able to maintain THAT weight over Christmas holidays will really be an impressive personal accomplishment!!

I don't know that I really have a strategy in place just yet, but I'd planned to resume the habit of routine fasting this fall and that hasn't happened yet, so I think that will be step 1.

Running and walking is another thing that's sort of fallen by the wayside this fall since hubby's finally working full-time again, which means he's gone a minimum of 13 hours a day (and sometimes he doesn't even bother coming home, but sleeps in the truck overnight so that he can get more sleep hours) and the only days I can walk or run outside are kindergarten days and weekends. And even those have been pretty hit and miss, since he's been busy working at the shop on the trucks on weekends and the weather's been really damp the last several weeks. Of course, I have an elliptical and a couple workout videos, but so far, I haven't convinced myself to switch to those forms of exercise. That might be my step 2!

And cutting out evening snacking (AGAIN!) will be step 3. The never-ending battle!

All in all, I think 8.8 lbs in 7 weeks should be very doable. IF I start exercising some will-power.

I don't know what to call this post.

2009-10-20T10:11:00.002-05:00

It really isn't something I want to talk about very badly. But I think it's the truth and I think we, as Christians, have become too eager to pretend that it isn't. I accept that my beliefs may be wildly unpopular. And please understand I'm saying this as much to myself as anyone else. I'm very guilty of subscription to this attitude and its resulting behaviors.

So what am I talking about?

Well, I guess it's this whole mentality that we need to "embrace" or "own" our limitations and concentrate on inner beauty ~ that it doesn't matter how overweight we are, because inner beauty is more important.

Now, before you get all huffy, I do believe that inner beauty is more important than outward appearance. My problem isn't with that statement itself, but what bothers me about it is the way we use it as an excuse not to try to do what's right and responsible. It gets used as an excuse for not developing the self-discipline we so sorely need in our affluent society. We justify gluttony using phrases like this.

Contrary to what seems to be popular belief these days, even among Christians, gluttony is not a right! And yet it is being recognized as such even in courts of law. You can literally eat your way into a protected group with all the same legal rights as the blind or deaf.

In his book, The One Year Devotions for People of Purpose, in the devotional called "Is Gluttony a Right?" Chuck Colson states:

"Laws are supposed to remind us what we ought to do. But the pro-gluttony ruling sanctions giving in to what we want to do ~ even if it's unhealthy. Folks who binge on candy and chips can now do so with the confidence that even the courts will defend their right to self-indulge.
Christians ought to view the temptation to overeat as a challenge to build character, not fat reserves. Living in an affluent culture as we do, many of our temptations come not because we have too little but because we have so much. Unlike people in poor cultures, [North] Americans can afford to buy all the food we want ~ including the high-calorie junk food that puts on the pounds.

Proverbs 30 reminds us that both poverty and riches can be a trap. Poverty may tempt us to steal, but riches tempt us to gluttony.

Philippians 3 condemns gluttony as a form of idolatry. People whose 'god is their stomach' are headed for eternal destruction.

The last thing we need is false compassion that turns human weakness into a civil right."

It's good there are people standing up and saying we shouldn't be judging people based on whether they're skinny or fat, that it's their character and personality that matter. Better yet, ones that actually LIVE by that principle and demonstrate that they actually believe what they say. But it's BAD that we are allowing these arguments to lull us into the belief that gluttony is no longer a sin.

We CAN be beautiful regardless of our size. True beauty IS on the inside and that matters MOST to God. We should definitely have this attitude with regards to others, but when examining ourselves, we need to be careful we don't embrace this idea too tightly and allow it to become license for indulgence. If our lives are evidence of what we believe, of what doctrine we subscribe to, a woman of faith should demonstrate her desire for godliness with a heart attitude of modesty and self-control.

We do need a healthy self-image, but we also need to remember to look at ourselves in the context of "what do my physical appearance and my eating habits say about my relationship with Christ? Is it obvious that I'm allowing the power of God to transform me and to help me fight temptation, or obvious I'm not?"

We need a healthy self-esteem. But we need to be careful self-esteem doesn't become self-love, which very often gets used as an excuse to NOT change. God's grace does cover our failures; He does love us unconditionally, but that doesn't necessarily mean He thinks we're perfect just the way we are. God's grace is not a license to sin; it's the power He gives us to fight temptation.

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

(1 Cor. 6:19-20)

Weigh-in Wednesday

2009-10-14T07:01:00.003-05:00

I'm basically the same as last week. Up 0.6.

But considering there were two Thanksgiving potlucks and one big turkey dinner with friends, I'm considering that maintenance.

I'm glad this challenge officially ends on Saturday though, rather than today...
...that gives me a couple more days to try and lose the Thanksgiving ounces ~ and hopefully even a couple extra!!

Every year on the last Sunday in October, our church gets together with the other small churches from our particular affiliation that are within a couple hours' drive of each other, and this year, they're having a food collection offering, so that will be the perfect place to bring what I'm hoping will amount to at least 4 lbs of groceries!! Maybe, I'll include next week's weigh-in to boost my "donate-able" weight!

I have not done as well with this challenge as I was hoping to, but I guess I've pretty much just exposed the problem, too. I was HOPING it instead of DOING IT. When will I ever learn?!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2009-10-07T06:40:00.003-05:00

Ugh. I've been such slacker the last two weeks. Not blogging much, forgetting to weigh myself, eating whenever and whatever I felt like...

Needless to say, I was a little surprised this morning when I stepped on the scale.

In a good way.

I'm down 2.2 from two weeks ago!! Which brings me to only 3.6# for this challenge, but an even 24 since I started trying to lose weight right after Easter.

Which means that....

...since 1997 ~
the year I got married,
and the year my roller-coaster weight began its initial, mountainous climb ~

I'm the lightest I've ever been!!

Woo-hoo!!!!!

Thoughts on Motivation

2009-10-01T10:00:00.004-05:00

So, I lost track of all the eating I did over the weekend. It wasn't super bad (though not that great either!), but I just didn't keep track.

I missed weigh-in, too.

I've found myself saying a lot lately that I've lost my motivation.

I've lost "that lovin' feelin..." so to speak.

But you know, I've spent a lot of time studying my Bible lately (I've got a lot more time on my hands now that my youngest is in kindergarten!!), and I've come to believe that this thing we call "motivation" is, in many ways, no different from love or faith.

They're not feelings; they're decisions.

Waiting to FEEL motivated is a fatal flaw in weight-loss efforts or any other goal-setting exercise. If we base motivation on feelings, it's only temporary ~ and often won't be there at all!! But if we base motivation on knowledge, and decide to persevere regardless of how we feel, that's when we'll continually experience success.

I can choose to wait to feel like turning down snacks, or I can choose to turn them down because I know it's smarter, healthier, and more character-building than the alternative. The former might happen every now and again, but the latter is a conscious decision which is the basis for a permanent lifestyle change.

One is completely within our control. The other is just wishful thinking. (Seriously, who can honestly claim they feel like NOT snacking??!!)

What are you choosing today? To practice what you know is good, wise, and healthy; or wait until the motivation to do so strikes again?

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-09-22T06:15:00.019-05:00

Tuesday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1/2 c. skim milk, 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella
Lunch: 1 serving Campbell's Chicken & Tortellini soup
Afternoon: 1 banana, 1 mug hot chocolate (made w/skim milk, cocoa and sugar)
Supper: 2 small servings Black Beans & Rice, fresh cucumber chunks and cherry tomatoes, 1 c. ice tea

Wednesday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk

2.25 miles: 25 min
(walked the 1/8-mile warm-up and cool-down, but jogged the full 2 miles!!)

Afternoon: 1 banana, 2 mugs green tea w/a bit of honey, 2 small fresh carrots (dirt and everything!)
Supper: 1 c. Veggie Cream Soup, 3 cheesey drop biscuits
Evening: another mug of green tea/honey

Yes! A successful fasting day! Finally. (I allowed the banana and carrots because I had no fruit or veggie juice in the house)

Thursday
Breakfast: 1 c. skim milk, coffee w/skim milk (some from the 1 c.), 1 small slice toast w/margarine
Lunch: small serving leftover Hamburger Stroganoff w/spaghetti, 1 orange
Afternoon: 1 fresh carrot, and later, FIVE fresh chocolate chip oatmeal cookies w/1 c. skim milk. Sheesh. How can you tell I rarely bake cookies?! What a treat!
Evening (skipped supper since hubby wasn't home and I wasn't hungry ~ go figure.): one cheese & red pepper sandwich (2 slices bread, low-fat Miracle Whip, 1/2 a fresh red pepper and cheddar slices to cover one piece of bread), 1 c. ice tea...

...and three more cookies w/1 c. skim milk

Friday
Breakfast: 1/2 Tim Horton's chocolate glazed Boston cream donut, 1/2 maple glazed donut, 1 c. skim milk, coffee w/skim milk

Dang it, The Bushman brought home donuts in the middle of the night and I just couldn't resist this morning. The second fasting day of the week is off to a bit of a rocky start!!

2.25 miles: 30 min
(walked 1/4 mile, jogged 3/4 mile, walk 1/4, jog 3/8, walk 1/8, jog 3/8, walk 1/8)

Lunch: polished off way too much leftover tuna noodle casserole AND hamburger stroganoff. And ate 3 more cookies w/a tall glass of milk.
Afternoon: handful pretzels, 2 slices processed cheese
Supper: two small cobs of corn, large serving Crispy Potato Cubes w/fat-free sour cream, small chunk baked ham, 2 large servings cucumber salad
Evening: another FOUR cookies w/a tall glass of milk!

I think we will call this day Tammi and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad DAY!! Yikes.

Saturday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1 banana
Lunch: 1-1/2 homemade Egg McMuffins w/ham & processed cheese, 1 c. skim milk

2.5 mile bike ride w/girls: 60 min
(with a stop to visit the horses a mile south of us)
3 mile bike ride to the store in town and back: 20 min
(can't have a hotdog supper without chips!!)

Supper: 2 large handfuls chips, 1 hotdog, 1/2 c. beans, two pieces Fudgy Toffee Bars, 2 c. skim milk

Sunday
Breakfast: medium bowl Alpha-Bits w/skim milk, coffee w/skim milk, 1 small slice toast w/margarine
Lunch: 1 hotdog w/processed cheese, 2 medium fresh carrots, WAY too many chips, 1/2 c. ice tea

2.25 miles: 30 min
(jog 3/8 mi, walk 1/8 mi X 4; 1/8 mi walk warm-up/cool-down at each end)
lawn-mowing: 20 min

Supper: 1 serving Zucchini Casserole (added carrots and ham), 2 Cornmeal Muffins, 1 c. ice tea, 2 pieces Fudgy Toffee Bars, 2 c. skim milk

Ate WAY too much this weekend. Don't remember the last time I felt hungry, but have felt over-full for the last two days already. NOT GOOD.

Monday
Breakfast: too much coffee w/skim milk, 2 c. skim milk (one hot w/sugar & cocoa)

2.25 miles: 45 min
(walked today)

Lunch: 1 fresh carrot, 5 fresh cherry tomatoes
Afternoon: 1 Zucchini Nut Muffin, 1 c. Chai tea w/honey
Supper: small serving leftover Coffee Cup Pork Roast & gravy over mashed potatoes, 1 serving cucumber salad, 1 c. ice tea
Evening: 1 large bowl Mini-Wheats cereal w/skim milk

Total exercise time: 3 hrs, 50 min (avg. 32.8 min/day)
largely moderate exercise this week

Another less-than-stellar week. Man, I'm sure not doin' much to feed the hungry around here!!

Weigh-in Wednesday

2009-09-16T04:49:00.001-05:00

Well...

I snacked too much.

I haven't resumed fasting on kindergarten days like I promised.

I'm still waitin' on Ms. TOM (I was expecting her on the weekend, but she's a li'l unpredictable sometimes)...

So, all things considered, I guess a loss of only 0.4 lbs isn't half bad.

No, the problem isn't being happy with a little loss. The problem is that I'm not keeping my promises to cut out habitual evening snacking and to get back into the routine of fasting two or three days a week!

I need a good, swift butt-kicking again!! (any takers??)

I'm no longer in a position where it will be possible to lose 10 lbs this challenge, but I'm still aiming for 7.

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-09-15T05:23:00.013-05:00

Monday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 2 fried eggs, 1 slice toast w/margarine & honey

2.25 miles: 30 min
(4 intervals of jogging 3/8-mile and walking 1/8-mile with a 1/8-mile warm-up and cool-down at each end)

Supper: one hotdog bun w/Cheez Whiz and sloppy joes, fresh corn on the cob, 2 c. iced tea, 1 small piece Puffed Wheat Squares

Tuesday

Breakfast: coffee w/CoffeeMate, 1 Banana Chocolate Chip Muffin w/margarine, 1 slice cheddar
Lunch: Sloppy Joe burrito w/one slice melted cheddar, cucumbers, 1 c. iced tea

short bike ride w/girls: 15 min

Afternoon: 1 c. 1% milk w/strawberry syrup
Supper: 1 serving Zucchini Casserole (made w/bacon), large serving cooked, fresh carrots w/a hint of honey & margarine, 1 c. ice tea
Evening: 1 Bacardi Pina Colada Rum cooler

Wednesday

Breakfast (per Grade 2 back-to-schooler!): half-serving Overnight French Toast Casserole w/a drizzle of syrup, 1 c. 1% milk, coffee w/1% milk

2.25 miles: 30 min
(same intervals as Monday)

Lunch: leftovers from yesterday supper ~ very small serving Zucchini Casserole and small serving fresh, cooked carrots. Also had 3 small fresh cucumbers and 1 c. pink lemonade
Supper: 1 serving Chicken with Bacon w/gravy, 1/2 large baked potato, large helping cooked green beans, 1 small piece Chocolate Zucchini Cake w/cream cheese frosting

Thursday

Breakfast: medium serving porridge w/brown sugar & 1% milk, coffee w/1% milk, 1/2 slice toast w/margarine

2.25 miles: 30 min
(walk 1/8 mi, jog 1/2 mi, walk 1/4 mi, jog 1/2 mi, walk 1/4 mi, jog 1/2 mi, walk 1/8 mi)

Afternoon Snack: large handful ripple chips w/ketchup, Oh Henry! chocolate bar
Supper: 1 small piece fried ham, scrambled eggs (2), 3 slices leftover baked potatoes fried, 2 c. ice tea
Evening: 1/3 bag microwave popcorn

Friday

Beakfast: 1 slice toast w/margarine & Nutella, 1 c. skim milk, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch: medium bowl Kraft Dinner macaroni & cheese w/small slice of leftover ham cut in pieces, 1 c. ice tea
Afternoon: 2 small mugs chai tea w/skim milk & honey, 1 piece Chocolate Zucchini Cake w/cream cheese icing
Supper: 1 serving One-Pot Ham Dinner, 1 medium ear of fresh corn on the cob, 3 large fresh cucumber chunks, 1 c. ice tea

lawn mowing: 60 min

Evening: several small Jello jigglers, 1 piece of bread w/margarine & Nutella, 1 large plate of nacho chips w/melted cheddar dipped in salsa & fat-free sour cream. CRAP.

Saturday

Brunch: a few crispy-fried potato slices, two slices toast ~ one w/margarine & Nutella, one w/margarine and fresh tomato slices, 1 c. skim milk, coffee w/skim milk, 1 mug hot cocoa made w/skim milk
Afternoon: two small Jello jigglers
Supper: 1 c. ice tea, way too many Onion Patties dipped in fat-free sour cream, one chicken quesadilla (one 10" whole wheat tortilla, cooked chicken, 1/2 c. shredded cheddar) dipped in salsa and fat-free sour cream

2.25 miles: 30 min
(same intervals as Monday)

Sunday

Breakfast: 1-1/2 slices of toast ~ the whole slice w/just margarine, the half w/margarine & saskatoon jam ~ 1 c. skim milk, coffee w/skim milk
Lunch (accepted a last-minute lunch invitation after church): 2 servings ham, 2 small baked potatoes w/margarine, one ear fresh corn on the cob w/margarine, fresh cuke slices
Afternoon (bridal shower): lots of fruit w/chocolate fondue, one small piece cake w/fondant icing, 3 slices cold cuts, 2 little chunks of cheese, 1 c. ice tea, 1 c. coffee w/real cream

2.25 miles: 45 min
(walked today)

Supper: 8 leftover onion patties w/fat-free sour cream, 1 bowl cereal w/skim milk, 1 piece Chocolate Zucchini Cake w/cream cheese icing

Eeeesh, talk about lethal food combinin'. Yikes.

Monday
Breakfast: coffee w/skim milk, 1/2 c. skim milk

2.25 miles: 30 min
(same intervals as last Monday & Wednesday)

Lunch: one whole leftover chicken quesadilla w/fat-free sour cream & salsa dip, 2 handfuls nacho chips to use up the rest of the dip, 1 tall glass ice tea
Supper: two small servings Hamburger Stroganoff w/spaghetti, 1 medium ear corn on the cob

Evening: 3 tiny pieces of pizza and 1 tiny piece of triple chocolate cheesecake (samples from an upcoming school fundraising project at the parent advisory council meeting)

Total exercise time: 4.5 hrs (avg. 38 min/day)

mostly moderate to hard exercise

Well, I didn't do so well with fasting on kindergarten days, which would have been Thursday and yesterday. (failing miserably might be more accurate!!) I didn't do so well with cutting out snacking either. So despite having done relatively well with exercising again, I'm still not making great progress.

Weigh-in Wednesday

2009-09-09T04:07:00.003-05:00

Amazingly enough, I CAN actually report a loss!!!! And somewhat greater than the measely fifth of a pound I was predicting yesterday, too!

I'm down 1.8 from last week, which is ~ considering I'm expecting "TOM" to arrive within the next week, and especially considering the overeating I did while in the city ~

pretty.
dang.
awesome!!!
(if I do say so myself!)

I'm still not quite as light as I was three weeks ago, but I'm down exactly a pound from my starting weight for this challenge, so that means I've earned one pound of non-perishable food items to donate at the end ~ woo-hoo!

Walk the Talk Tuesday

2009-09-08T05:59:00.002-05:00

Well, you'll be delighted to know you've been spared reading through my food and exercise journal for the last week! I kept track of absolutely NONE of that, except I know I went for a jog last Tuesday night and then finally again yesterday morning. That's a whopping two times in one week ~ my slackest week all summer, no doubt.

Probably one of the worst in terms of eating a little more than normal, too. (just a little!)

I did so well at the beginning of July when I visited The Big City, but this time, not so much. I ate way too much and didn't exercise once. Oh wait, that's not quite true. I didn't go for a walk or a jog, but I did help one of my sisters-in-law move into her new apartment on the third floor of a building without an elevator. I guess that qualifies as exercise!!! I still ate way too much that day, though. And the day after and the day after that.

All in all, pretty undisciplined and VERY reminiscent of how it used to be all the time.

I stepped on the scale yesterday morning just to see if I'd come anywhere close to losing like I planned to despite being away from home, and amazingly, I might actually manage it. If anything, I'm sure it won't be more than a fifth of a pound, but this time, a fifth of a pound will make me very happy!!

A New Challenge ~ Shrinking for Good

2009-09-02T05:00:00.009-05:00

Not just for my own good this time, but for hungry folks as well.

As you may or may not already know, the ladies (and man) over at The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans run weight-loss challenges and issue prizes for biggest losers and whatnot, but this challenge is a little different. Yes, the goal is still weight-loss, but we're also shrinking for a cause beyond ourselves this time.

For each week's loss ~ assuming there will BE a loss, of course!! ~ we will go out and buy a non-perishable food item of roughly the same weight so that at the end of the 7 weeks, we will (hopefully) have a pile of great food which we will then donate to our local food banks! Isn't that a great idea?!

And you know, it's great for a few reasons ~ not only to give to those less fortunate and to give us more incentive to lose, but it will also help us see a little more literally how much weight we've lost. Those ounces and grams add up to more than we give ourselves credit for and now we'll actually be able to see just how much!!

Personally, I think this is the best challenge yet because it's going to make me think more about why and how much I eat, what I really don't need, and who needs it so much more than I do.

I started this challenge out at 160.8 on Sunday, and today I'm UP .8 at 161.6, but I've been having a lot of meltdowns this last week, so it's really no surprise. This week, I've started "getting back to basics" and next week I expect to report a loss, even though we'll be visiting family for much of the duration.

I'd LIKE to drop a total of 10 lbs by the closing date of October 17, but since I'm within about 15 of my target weight, I'm not sure I'll be able to shed at a rate of 1.4/week. That seems like it might be a little unrealistic, but I'll give it a shot!!